(The Movie Channel [aka The Movie Channel East], The Movie Channel X & Showtime Family.) The movie is 90 minutes long. TV-PG All times are Eastern. The movie...
"TV or Not TV": Ralph: "You once said: 'Ralph, I would be happy to live in a tent with you.'" Alice: "I still am. I think it would be an improvement." "Young...
"Curse of The Kramdens": "Ghost": "I'm the Ghost of Shammus O' Toole. If your name is Kramden Beware! Ha ha ha!" Ed: "This is Ed Norton. Capital N-capital...
"Champagne & Caviar": (Ralph wants Ed to not be at the Kramden apartment becaus ehe is afraid he is going to embarrass Ralph when Ralph's boss gets there.) Ed:...
"The Loudspeaker": Ralph: "Do you know that if I become Grand High Exalted Mystic Ruler, we have the honor of free burial at the Raccoon National Cemetery? Do...
Episode #64 TV: Half-hour. VCR: Attached to "Pickels" & "Cold." DVD: Attached to "My Fair Landlord", "Cold", "Halloween Party" & "Lost Job." Alice is cleaning...
"The Worry Wart": Ralph: "Oh, is that all that they are going to do? They're just gonna take it out of my refund? It just so happens Alice that I was planning...
"A Promotion Part 1": Ralph: "I know how to throw my weight around." Alice: "If you did, you wouldn't leave it where it is." "Young At Heart": Ralph: "This...
"A Woman's Work Is Never Done": Ed: "I would like to have my coffee with one lump." (Ed rings bell.) Thelma: "You keep ringing that bell like that and you will...
"A Man's Pride": Bill Davis: "I'm an early riser. I can come to see you between 8 and 9 am." Ralph: "You can't come to see during those times because that is...
"Move Uptown": Ralph: "Where's Norton? We have to unload the trailor." Trixie: "I don't know." (Crash! Clatter! Bing! Bang! Boom!) (Ed comes out with a lot of...
(AmericanLife TV): TV-G All times are Eastern. Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden. Art Carney as Ed Norton. Shelia MacRae as Alice Kramden. Jean Kean as Trixie...
"Young At Heart": Alice: "I want to do the things that youg people do. That is what keeps you young." Ralph: "You want to do the things that young people do?...
"Ralph Kramden Inc.": Ralph: "Are you sure that that suitcase can hold $40,000,000. Why don't you cut pieces of paper into the shape of dollars bills and find...
"$99,000 Answer": Ralph: "$600.00. Peanuts, peanuts, what am I gonna do with peanuts??" Alice: "Eat 'em like an other elephant." "A Woman's Work Is Never...
"Dial J For Janitor": Ralph (sarcastically): "I hope you realize that water always recedes its level." Ed: "Yes, we have heard rumors to that effect down the...
"Ralph Kramden Inc.": Ralph: "How could you tell if you saw a yellow-bellied sap sucker when they are not supposed to be around here." Ed: "Because the bird...
"Man In The Blue Suit": Ed: "Who are they going to give your suit to?" Ralph: "Some poor unfortunate person who is broken-down." Ed: "That is right. Someone...
"Brother Ralph": Ralph: "You don't know how to handle money." Alice: "Of course not. I never had any practice." "Boys & Girls Together": (The gang is at a...
From The Honeymooners Message Board section at sitcomsonline.com: This show will be on PBS this Thursday at 8 am and 3pm (tomorrow Eastern time. Time may vary...
"The Deciding Vote": (Ralph turns on the vaccum cleaner. It doesn't work.) Ed: "I think that motor needs a drop or erl." Ralph: "Yeah, that is all that it...
Episode #67 TV: In two parts. VCR: Attached to "What's The Name?" DVD: Attached to "Hero" & "Two Tickets To The Fight." When this episode was remade as a Color...
"Hello Mom": Ralph: "Cream-chipped beef again?" Alice: "Yeah, but I fixed it a new way, Ralph. I got the recipe out of a movie magazine. Its Ricardo Cortez's...
"A Woman's Work Is Never Done": Ralph: "Stop saying 'okay.' Say: 'That will be very good sir.'" Thelma: "Okay." "A Woman's Work Is Never Done": Ralph: "This...
"A Weighty Problem Part 1": Ralph (knocking on door): "Got any mashed potatoes out there?" (Door opens.) Ralph: "I said do you have any mashed potatoes out...
"Ralph Kramden Inc.": Alice: "I burned my finger on that darn stove." Ralph: "Gee. If you are not buring yourself. It's my food." "The Safety Award": Ed: "Can...
"TV or Not TV": (Ralph is trying to tell Alice that he has more money in is wallet than Ed.) Ralph: "I haev it here." (Ralph points to his hip pocket.) Alice:...
(AmericanLife TV): TV-G All times are Eastern. Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden. Art Carney as Ed Norton. Shelia MacRae as Alice Kramden. Jean Kean as Trixie...
"Oh My Aching Back": Ralph (yelling in pain): "WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAA!" (Alice comes out.) Alice: "What was that?" Ralph: "I was just yawning." Alice:...
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