Homo novus ((title in the works))
A Xena Warrior Princess Fanfiction Story
Author: Calen
Calen2k@...
April 30, 2002

Disclaimer: Once upon a time there was a guy. He wrote a story with
characters and settings he didn't own, but he put a disclaimer on his
story and that made it a little less illegal. Most of the characters
in this story belong to Renpics and some other people, but not me.

Subtext: Nope.

Warnings: Language, violence.

Rating: PG-13 for now.

Season: s4 end. Beginning of s5.

Summary: Joxer heads to Rome to find out whether his dreams were just
nightmares or something more. He gets entangled in a mess that he has
no, nor does he want any control of…

Author's Notes: I've wanted to do an AU fic with Joxer and the events
of the end of s4 for a while now, so here we go.



Prologue:

He walked along the wet muddy path, the dull surroundings only
serving to add to his already somber mood. The sky was filled with
dark clouds, the wind howling as it blew the long grass harshly. The
few trees by the sides of the path looked old, like they were ready
to tumble over. Rain pelted his face, but he kept up the pace, not
wanting to stop or rest for fear the dreams would come again. He
hoped they were just that, dreams, nightmares he thought, picking up
the pace. He had only told Amarice, an Amazon that was a friend of
Gabrielle's; what he had seen in the dreams. Which was why she was
walking beside him in a similarly somber mood. She thought they might
be visions. He could only hope that they weren't. Noting her
travelling companion's pace quicken, she did the same to keep up with
him.

''We should be there soon,'' Amarice told him, receiving an answering
nod in reply. Arriving near the city boundaries, she told Joxer she
was going to see if she could find any information on where their
friends might be.

Taking note of his surroundings, Joxer watched people move about
trying to get wherever they were going as quickly as possible. He
caught sight of something that stirred uneasiness in him. 'You
shouldn't be surprised,' he told himself. 'This is Rome, the
birthplace of all this madness. It's more commonplace here than
anywhere else in the empire.' The thoughts couldn't stop how he felt
though. The cages were too small. Two people… slaves… to a cage,
except for one. The man by himself looked like he might be from Chin.
He remembered reading a description in one of Gabrielle's scro.....

'Gabby,' he thought. 'I wish I could help them, but I have to find
you.' Deciding that he could at least help a little, even if it was
only in the way of food. Joxer walked towards the lone man's cage,
pulling some bread from his pack. He put his hand through the
bars. ''Here,'' he said.

The man looked up at him and then looked around, obviously trying to
see if anyone was watching. Turning his attention back to the one
offering him bread, he nodded and took it. The man looked a little
odd but his makeshift armour did nothing to take away the look of
understanding and kindness he saw. ''Thank you.'' His only answer was
a kind smile.

''What's your name?'' he asked, hiding the bread within his thin
robes.

''Joxer... just... Joxer,'' Joxer answered.

The guy had a faint withered smile on his face. ''Well, Joxer... just
Joxer, tha...'' He was interrupted by a loud shout.

''Get away from there!'' Joxer looked in the direction the loud
exclamation had come from and saw a Centurion looking over at then.
The guy shimmied backwards until he was pressed into the other side
of his cage. Joxer also backed away and walked to where Amarice was
now waiting. He wanted to help... help them all, but he couldn't
afford to be captured.

''Joxer! Where have you been? It doesn't matter - we have to go,"
Amarice told him, not waiting for his response. Following quickly
behind her, he had a bad feeling in his gut.

==================

'No,' his mind screamed again. 'No.' It was like a never-ending
mantra running through his mind. They were dead, Xena, Gabby. His
beautiful Gabby… She looked so serene, peaceful...dead. A sob hitched
in his throat as he pulled a blanket from his pack and placed it
gently over Gabrielle's barely clad body, raising the edges to her
chin.

''She's so cold,'' he whispered to himself. Hearing Amarice talking
to Eli, he heard the angry tone in her voice. She was right. The way
of peace, he thought, bitterness beginning to spread through his
mind. Turning his head back to Gabrielle, he brushed her cheek with
the back of his hand. Reaching into his pack again, he pulled out a
scroll and quill and began to write. The words flowed from his heart
straight to his fingers. He held nothing back. Everything he felt,
everything he had ever wanted to tell her he wrote. Finishing up, he
noticed damp spots on the scroll - his tears. Clenching his eyes
shut, he rolled up the scroll and placed it under the blanket near
the arm closest to him.

Leaning back on his heels, Joxer realised that the talking had
stopped. Opening his damp eyes, he looked over to where Amarice and
Eli were now standing and focused his glare on the cause of all this.
Deep down, he knew it wasn't Eli's fault. Gabby wasn't easily led.
She made her own decisions, but he needed someone to blame.

Pushing himself to his feet, Joxer stepped up to Eli, keeping his
eyes on the prophet's. Eli took a step back as if expecting to be
berated again. Sensing Amarice move around them to be beside her
queen, Joxer paid her no heed. ''I may be a fool, a jester that they
laughed at but I, I loved them,'' Joxer said, silencing Eli with a
raised hand when he tried to talk. ''And I'd like to believe that
they loved me.'' Turning his head, he put his index finger and thumb
to his eyes, wiping the tears away before continuing.

''To survive in this day and age means that suffering, blood, and
death must thrive. And while men like Caesar live, it shall always be
so. I may be a fool, but I understand that. Gabby understood that
until you, YOU polluted her mind with this 'way of love'.'' He
stepped up closer to Eli and saw tears running down the man's face.
Joxer could not help but allow his own tears to fall. Raising his
voice he all but shouted, ''Your way of love got them killed! It
wasn't right for Gabrielle. As long as she was with Xena, how COULD
it be?'' he sobbed. ''She would never leave Xena's side. They were
family,'' his breath hitched.

''My family - they're dead because of you.'' Joxer looked intensely
at the man's face, saw the tears flowing freely just like his, saw
the guilt, the pain, every emotion that he felt tearing him apart
inside. He pushed down the urge to act out on his feelings of anger
towards Eli. He needed to do something – anything. How could he stop
the feelings, the anger - the hurt? They were just too much for him
to handle.

A million thoughts raced through his mind before he turned around and
looked at Amarice. ''Bury them,'' he told her. Heading for the
doorway, he said to himself, not caring if the others heard
him, ''This fool wants some payback.''

Okay, I've gone through the archives of the JFFG
and the GJRS mailing lists and done my best to
list all the fics that are eligible for this
year's awards.  And just to make y'alls work a
bit easier, I've done my best to organize them by
category; so if you need a suggestion for a
category and you can't think of anything that
fits it, check the list and there might be
something.

I didn't do anything for favourite original
character, series, author, or fic archive,
because I sorta think that's so much a matter of
personal taste and you have a lot to choose from
without it being quite as overwhelming as the
fics are...

There are a few I didn't organize.  The reason?
I, well, I haven't had time to read them yet.
-_-;; But gimme a break!  Look at how many I
*have* read!  I'm above reproach - above it, I
say!  ...Sure. ;P  Stories marked with an
asterisk (*) are archived at the JFFG archives -
www.jffg.org - for your easy reference.  The
others, you can contact the authors who are
listed if you need a copy, or you can wait - I
may yet be archiving them.

And, one last thing you have to read through
before the list: please keep in mind that these
categorizations are *my* doing, and you might see
them differently.  For instance I put "Female of
the Species" in comedy  and you might see it in
drama.  Feel free to nominate stories in a
category different from the one I put them in -
it's more up to you.  Just remember to keep the
guidelines in mind. *G*

Okay!  The nominating period only has a week go
to and so far we only have *three* sets of
nominations!  Help us out people or else there
will be no GQA 2003 (and maybe not a GQA 2002
O_o)!

And now, the list!


*****

Drama:
-Looking Through Your Eyes, by L. J. Paxton *
-Sometimes You Are, Gabby, by L.J. Paxton
-Child by Blood, by Seriana Ritani *
-The Twelth Year, by Seriana Ritani *
-The Thirteenth Year, by Seriana Ritani *
-The Fourteenth Year, by Seriana Ritani *
-Joxer, the Warrior Goddess?  by KScott2112 *
-Joxer's Got A Girlfriend, by KScott2112 *
-The Lost Hero, by KScott2112 *
-The Frame-Up, by Susan Owens *
-Conflict and Trouble, by Susan Owens *
-Sometimes It Ain't Easy, by Susan Owens *
-To the Happy Couple, by Susan Owens *
-Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder, by Susan
Owens *
-The Child, by Susan Owens *
-An Unusual Saviour, by Tristan Jones *
-Chained Melody, by Tristan Jones *
-Let My Love Open the Door, by Jennifer Campbell
-Hello, Goodbye, by Kate Campbell
-Heal the Pain, by Sandra Pascoe *
-A Tragedy of Eros, by Phil Hernandez *
-First Date, by Xedra *

Comedy:
-Female of the Species, by Seriana Ritani *
-All About Eve, by Melissa Flores *
-Happy Halloween, by Susan Owens *
-The Wintertime Musical, by Susan Owens *
-How Jace Became an Honorary Amazon, by Susan
Owens *
-Lonely This Solstice, by Jerry Hendy
-Joxer's Kisses, by Nancy Lorenz

Vignette:
-So Long, by Kawcrow *
-Ghost Riders in the Sky, by Raye *
-The 155-Word Uber Story With the Worst Pun Ever,
by Phil Hernandez *
-The Bell Tolled For Me, by Seriana Ritani *

Uber:
-Minstrellations, by trfan *
-Banding Together, by trfan *
-Changes, by trfan *
-If I Fall, by Tricia Stewart *
-Mixed-Up Girl, by Melanie Lakey *
-Generation Body Switch, by Sara Miller

Novella:
-My Cup Runneth Over, by Susan Owens *
-The Heir Up There, by Jennifer Brouillard
-Changing of the Guard, by Dharma Bum *
-The Things We Do For Love, by Xebbie *

Slash:
-Children of Night, by Mac Xavier *

Crossover:
-Joxer: Spiderman, by KScott2112 *
-Temptation Island, by KScott2112 *
-The Strange World, by KScott2112 *
-Planet of the Apes, by KScott2112 *
-The Real Mightiest Mortal, by KScott2112 *
-King of Pain, by Jennifer Campbell
-Everything Falls Apart, by Jennifer Brouillard
-When the Night Falls, by Dharma Bum
-Everything You've Ever Dreamed, by Susan Owens

Parody:
-On His Tod, by Jerry Hendy *
-A Knight's Tale, by Jerry Hendy *
-Words of the Gods, by Danii *

Erotic:
-Delayed Reactions, by Dharma Bum
-Post-Mortem, by Dharma Bum
-Better Than Imaged, by Jenny Kate
-Duel, by Findley Boyd
-Associated Lust, by Moire

Work In Progress:
-An Arcadian Werewolf in Egypt, by Danii *
-Lands of Lore, by Anne Beaudry *
-Decisions, by Anne Beaudry *
-The House of Anubis, by Anne Beaudry
-The Trio and Their Uncle, by Susan Owens *
-A Matter of Amazon Honor, by Phil Hernandez *
-And the Eagle Flies With the Dove, by Mac Xavier
*
-The Highlander, by Moire
-The Journey, by KScott2112 *
-Spring Fever, by Denise Romesburg

Poem:
-Letter To A Friend, by Tabs
-Untitled, by Allison Garrett

Filk:
-Call Xena Tonight, by Phil Hernandez
-Don't Come Along Twice, by Suzanne Smiley
-Jox, by Findley Boyd
-All Dead All Dead, by Denise Romesburg
-How Are We Supposed to Live Without You? by
Allison Garrett

Uncategorized:
Melodies of Life by Sara Burch
The Helion Catacombs by Kirsten Corrao
Between A Rock and a Hard Place by Kirsten Corrao
Joxer the Legendary Journeys, vol. 1 & 2 by Jaz
Don't Make Me Over by Sara Miller
Come What May by Annie Banannie
A Second Chance by Areswarrior
Reflection by Rupert Brown
Secret Affections by Chloe
Inner Demons by Aeris
Restorations by Aeris
Taste of Heaven by Jessica Brewer

=====
"It's not easy being a single parent... juggling a family and a career, like so
many juggling balls... Two, I suppose..."

__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Yahoo! Health - your guide to health and wellness
http://health.yahoo.com

Rebecca and I were working on the same thing :p

Here's a list with links:
http://thebookcase.org/gqa/gqa2002.html

And, as I've noted on the page, let me know if I've gotten something wrong
or if something needs to be added.

-Raye

__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Yahoo! Health - your guide to health and wellness
http://health.yahoo.com

Hi sorry the first time  it send before I was ready




Parole Series 8: A Horse is Just a Horse of Course,
Unless…

Author: Susan Owens

Rated: PG

Summary: Joxer gets a horse

Disclaimer: I don't own them



Timeline: AU Fifth Season, ninth month of Jett's
parole from Maramis prison. Takes place one week after
the events chronicled in "The Child"



Copyright (c) 2002



It was late afternoon when they arrived in town. They
all looked down at Joxer who looked back at them.
"What? Why are you all staring at me? What did I do
now?"



Gabrielle rolled her eyes. "Joxer, I'm exhausted! We
could've been here hours ago if you had just ridden
with one of us instead of walking. Gods, I wish you'd
get a horse!"



Joxer shook his head. "I don't want a horse. They
can't be trusted."



Xena looked at him, eyes narrowing. "Are you including
our horses too, Joxer?"



Joxer returned her gaze but didn't answer right away.
"No, I guess not. I'll get us a place to stay for the
night." He hurried away from the others.



Xena and Gabrielle turned to Jett as they dismounted
their horses. "Okay, give!" Xena demanded. "Why is
Joxer so afraid of horses and don't give me that crap
that he thinks they eat people!"



Jett nodded. "It's a long story."



Xena folded her arms over her chest. "We've got plenty
of time."



Jett sighed heavily. "I really don't want to talk
about it."



"Listen Jett, it would really help if you did. I know
Joxer will ride a horse if he's forced to or as a last
resort, but he's a pretty lousy rider. Why didn't he
learn to ride?" Gabrielle asked curiously.



Jett looked at the bard and back at Xena. "We were all
taking riding lessons from Abu, the person in charge
of Father's horses." He paused and looked around,
making sure Joxer had not returned. Seeing that he
hadn't, he went on. "Jace and I caught on quickly, but
Joxer had trouble. Abu told our father he'd catch on
if he was given time. You have to understand that
Father demanded perfection in everything we did and he
was angry because Joxer wasn't perfect right away."



"Jett, nobody's perfect," Xena said.



"Xena, you don't know my father. Like I said, he
demanded perfection and if you didn't give him one
hundred percent, you may as well be dead."



Gabrielle shook her head. Xena nodded for Jett to go
on.



"One day, our father came out to watch us. I went
first and then Jace. We both did well in our father's
eyes. This was before Father knew about Jace being
different. At the time, he hid it pretty well. Then it
was Joxer's turn. He was trying his best, but he had
no rhythm with the horse and looked very clumsy on it.
Father kept yelling, "Sit up straight, boy! Don't
slouch!" He was only making things worse. Joxer
finally got so nervous that he fell off the horse.
Father was furious. The horse Joxer was riding was an
old mare and he thought Joxer should had been able to
ride her without a problem." Jett stopped and looked
around again.

"What are you looking for?" asked Gabrielle.



"Not what, who. I'm looking for Joxer. If I have to
tell you this story, I don't want him to hear it."



"Why?"



"Because he doesn't remember what happened that day
and I don't want him to!"



"Maybe it's best that he does hear it."



"No, Xena! If you make me tell him, I swear that I'll
go back to Maramis, make them lock me up and have the
guards throw away the key!"



Xena's jaw dropped open in momentary surprise. "I only
said it might help him!"



Jett turned away and spoke in a low voice. "I said NO!
Xena, you may be my keeper, but I won't tell him about
that day. That day has haunted me in dreams for a long
time. Jox has enough problems. He doesn't need this
one too!"



"It must had been something terrible," Gabrielle said
quietly.



Jett turned around to face the women. "It was. My
father ordered Jace and me to return to the house.
Jace obeyed out of fear, but I didn't. I hid so I
could see what Father was going to do instead. I
watched as Father pulled Joxer to his feet and
screamed at him that he was going to learn to ride. I
heard Joxer say he was trying but he was scared.
Father shook him and said, "You're afraid of an old
mare? I'll give you a horse to be afraid of!" He
ordered Abu to bring Lucifer, my father's horse. Gods,
nobody but Father could ride that black demon. I
watched as Abu begged Father not to do it, but Father
just ordered him to get the horse."



Jett stopped again. Xena knew he wouldn't finish the
story if he saw Joxer. She also wondered where Joxer
was. Turning to Gabrielle she said, "Gabrielle, why
don't you go look for Joxer? I think he might be
having a little trouble finding rooms."



Gabrielle looked at Xena. She also wanted to hear the
story. "Xena, I'm sure he's fine!"



"Gabrielle, please. I promise I'll tell you the rest
of the story later."



"Okay. I'll go help Joxer," Gabrielle agreed.



They watched her walk away then Xena turned back to
Jett. "All right. Go on."



"Abu went and got Lucifer. Father held the horse's
reins and ordered Joxer to mount him. Joxer tried but
there was no way he was going to mount that horse, so
Father ordered Abu to get Joxer on the horse. Abu was
too afraid not to obey him, so he got Joxer on
Lucifer. Father then let go of the reins, whistled,
and Lucifer went mad. He bucked and twisted and
whirled around and around while Joxer tried to hang on
for dear life. I noticed Joxer somehow got his foot
caught in the stirrup and Father did too. He signaled
his horse to rear and when Lucifer did, he threw Joxer
and came crashing down. In my dreams I can still hear
that sickening thump as that horse's hooves landed on
Joxer."



Xena placed her hand on his shoulder. "You don't have
to finish. I can easily guess the rest."



"No, it's okay. Like you said, maybe it'll help. I
watched Abu run over to Joxer and my father just
stared at Joxer. He took his horse and said to Abu
before walking away, "That boy will never amount to
anything." I watched him walk away and then I heard
Abu calling for me. He told me to get a healer. I
didn't. I only stared at Joxer. He looked like he was
dead and I was scared. Abu shook his head and told me
to stay with him." Jett stopped again and turned away
from Xena. "But I didn't. I was too scared. I couldn't
go for a healer and I didn't want to stay because I
was afraid, so I didn't do either - I ran away. Abu
got one of the servants to stay with Joxer while he
went for the healer. Joxer was laid up for weeks and
when he finally was better, he didn't remember a thing
about what happened." He paused for a moment and
turned around, his dark brown eyes bleak and haunted.
"Xena, I let my brother down and he nearly died
because I didn't help him. That was when I swore that
nobody would ever hurt him again."



Xena nodded. "Okay, that seems like a good reason to
be afraid. It's too bad that nobody tried to help
Joxer at first."



"I know. Xena, if I could go back and change that, I
would."



"You can't - it's way too late for that. All we can do
now is help Joxer find a way so he will get over his
fear, but first he must know why he's afraid."



"No!"



"Yes! It might help and who knows? He might remember
it after all."



***********



Gabrielle went to look for Joxer. She had a pretty
good guess as to where he would be. She walked into
the tavern and sure enough, he was there having a
drink and telling his wild stories to the group.
"JOXER! Did you find us a place to stay for tonight?"




Joxer dropped his mug of mead on the floor and turned
around, wide-eyed. "Oh Gabrielle, I forgot! I was
having so much fun and it slipped my mind. And now
it's too late because the last room was just given
away for the night." His eyes dropped to the floor.



Gabrielle rolled her eyes and groaned. "Joxer, I
swear…"



Joxer looked up at her, miserable. Gabrielle's
features softened and she smiled. "Don't worry about
it, Joxer. We can sleep with the horses in the
stables."



"No. You wanted a nice bed to sleep in and I screwed
up again," Joxer replied glumly.



"It's okay, Joxer. Really, I don't mind sleeping in
the stables. I'm sure Xena and Jett won't mind either
- anything's better than sleeping outside in the rain.
Come on. Let's go get them." Joxer followed Gabrielle
outside the tavern with his head bowed.



When Gabrielle and Joxer found them, Xena immediately
noticed that something was not right. "Did you get us
a place to sleep for the night, Joxer?" she asked.



Joxer didn't look at her but murmured, "Uh… No… I
was...."



"You were what? Joxer, *what* were you doing?" Xena's
voice lowered to a deadly purr and he gulped loudly.



Gabrielle quickly spoke up before he could answer
Xena's question. "Entertaining some people who needed
cheering up. That's our Joxer, Xena, always thinking
of someone else! He saw a group of people inside the
tavern that looked down…" Gabrielle laughed and
slapped Joxer playfully on the back, almost making him
fall over from the force of it. "So Joxer was telling
them some funny stories to cheer them up. He lost
track of the time and didn't realize that all the
rooms in the tavern were sold out for the night."



Xena glared at the two of them. "Gabrielle, is that
the truth?"



Gabrielle looked at Xena calmly. "Yes."



Xena smiled. "Okay, then we'll sleep in the stables.
Well, at least it won't cost too much."



Jett grabbed Joxer in a headlock and gave him a
noogie. "That's my brother! Like Gabrielle said,
always thinking of others first."



Joxer pulled away, looking embarrassed. "Uh guys, can
we go and get ready for bed? I'm tired."



They all laughed and they walked over to the stables.
Xena looked around and nodded in approval. "Not bad.
It's clean and even better: it's cheap. I just better
not wake up to the same day, or so help me, I'll
scream!"



Jett stared at her. "The same day? What are you
talking about?"



Gabrielle rolled her eyes and Joxer groaned. "Don't
ask, Jett."



After a quick, light supper, everyone got ready for
bed. Gabrielle turned to Joxer before she closed her
eyes. "Joxer, think about what we said earlier. You
really should get a horse."



Joxer nodded and lay down with his hands behind the
back of his head, thinking. *If I buy myself a horse,
then they'd be proud of me.* Joxer suddenly sat up and
took out his money from his pack, counting it
carefully. He wondered if he could get a horse for
seventy dinars. He decided that in the morning he
would go and see as he put his money away.



"Joxer, what are you still doing up?"



Joxer turned around to see Gabrielle looking at him
curiously. "Uh, I was a little cold, so I was just
getting another blanket from my pack." He pulled out a
gray blanket and covered himself with it.



"Oh, okay. Good night, Joxer." She turned away from
him to get comfortable.



"Good night, Gabrielle." He waited a minute before he
spoke again. "Gabrielle?"



"Yes, Joxer. What is it?" she asked wearily, turning
around to face him.



"I uh, wanted to thank you for what you said to Xena
before. You didn't have to cover for me so I wouldn't
get in trouble for screwing up again."



"Joxer, I wasn't covering for you. I told the truth.
Were those people you were telling stories to unhappy
before you began talking to them?"



"Yeah."



Gabrielle smiled. "Well, there you are. I didn't lie
and you cheered those people up." She covered her
mouth as she yawned. "Good night."



Joxer returned the smile. "Good night, Gabrielle." He
settled down into his bedroll, closed his eyes and
drifted away to the land of Morpheus.



*****************



The sound of a rooster welcoming the morning sun
roused Xena from a sound sleep. She slowly opened her
eyes, rose to a sitting position, then stretched and
yawned. She sniffed the air and smelled something
cooking, breathing a sigh of relief that it wasn't
goose eggs. She looked over to see Joxer getting
breakfast ready and that Jett was missing. "Good
morning, Joxer. How long have you been up and where's
Jett?" she asked as she rose to her feet and walked
over to him.



Joxer looked up at her and smiled. "Hi, Xena. Jett
went to the well to fill the water skins. I've been up
for about an hour." He paused for a moment to stir the
stew bubbling in the pot. "The owner's wife came by
and gave us some stew and fresh bread for breakfast. I
was just about to wake you."



Xena nodded, looked into the pot and sniffed the
savory meal appreciatively. "That looks like there
might be *just enough* to feed the three of us and
Gabrielle," she said with a chuckle and Joxer grinned
at the mention of the bard's appetite as Jett walked
inside.



"Hey, Jett. You're just in time for breakfast," Xena
said. "I better get Gabrielle up, so you two better
grab what you want to eat now." The twins laughed and
Jett started spooning some stew into a bowl while
Joxer divided the loaf of bread into four equal
portions. They watched in amusement as Xena attempted
to wake the sleeping bard up. "Come on, Gabrielle. Get
up!" She shook Gabrielle gently at first then nudged
her roughly after no response from the dead-to-the
world bard. "Jett, you might have to get more water…"




"Whaaa… Don' wanna get up… Too early!" Gabrielle
moaned, then sniffed. "OH, BREAKFAST!" she gasped,
rising to a sitting position and rubbing her eyes.
Jett made a choking noise that sounded suspiciously
like laughter. "What's the matter with you?" she asked
as she and Xena walked over to join them.



"Nothing, Blond… uh, Gabrielle. The stew's a little
hot," Jett answered quickly and surreptitiously
flicked the silently giggling Joxer's ear. Joxer
immediately stopped laughing and gave them their
bowls.



The two women took what they wanted to eat and the
four ate breakfast in silence for a while. Halfway
through their meal, Joxer stopped eating and looked at
them for a moment then cleared his throat. "What is
it, Jox?" Jett asked.



"I decided to buy a horse."



"You're going to buy a horse?"



"Yes, Gabrielle. I think you guys are right. I need a
horse because I'm slowing you down."



"Joxer, you don't have to do this! Jett told us why
you're afraid of horses."



Joxer stared at Jett. "He told you about what Father
made Lucifer do to me."



Now it was Jett's turn to stare at Joxer. "You
remember what happened to you that day?"



"No I don't, but Father told me every detail and maybe
that's why I'm afraid. I believed that every horse was
like that demon. It wasn't until I got to know Argo
that I realized I was wrong. So, maybe there's an Argo
for me out there."



"Joxer, do you want my help?" Gabrielle offered.



"Thanks Gabrielle, but I want to do this myself. I
want to prove to myself that I can do this," Joxer
gazed at the bard intently.



"Joxer, how much money do you have?" Xena broke in
before Gabrielle started to argue with him.



"I have seventy dinars, Xena."



"Jox, that's never going to buy you a horse." Jett
searched around in his pockets and pulled out ten
dinars. "Here, this will help." Xena silently handed
Joxer five dinars from her money pouch. Jett turned to
Gabrielle. "So, what about you, Blond- uh, Gabrielle?
Do you have some money to contribute to the Joxer Buys
a Horse Fund?"



Gabrielle shook her head. "I've only got two stones in
my pocket."



Xena arched her eyebrow. "I'm not even going to ask
you why on Gaia's green earth you've got two stones in
your pocket."



"Rubbing two stones together helps me think!"
Gabrielle defended herself. "Besides, you know I don't
have any more money since I decided to buy Amber!"



"Right," Xena replied dryly. "Joxer, you've only got
eighty-five dinars on you. Let Gabrielle go with you.
She can haggle the price down."



"No, Xena. I'm not bad at haggling either. I'll be
back with a new horse - one that'll make Argo say, oh
wow, what a hunk!" Argo whinnied in response and
everybody laughed. They all waved as Joxer happily
walked away, singing his song:



"Joxer the Mighty,

He's very tidy!

He'll be there at twice the speed

'cuz he's got a brand new steed..."



They couldn't hear the rest of it because he was out
of earshot.



"I wonder what the rest of his new verse was,"
Gabrielle said as she watched him walk down the road.




"Uh Gabrielle, do you really want to know?"



"Not really, Xena," the bard admitted. "Actually, I'd
really like to know how come he's always got money on
him. You don't think he's been gambling again, do
you?"



Xena frowned as she watched Joxer's retreating form.
"I don't know, Gabrielle. I hope not, especially after
what happened to him last time." She turned to Jett,
who shrugged his shoulders and shook his head.



******



Joxer arrived in town a short while later and headed
for the horse trader. He looked at all the horses,
instinctively shying away from the black ones. The
trader noticed him and walked over. "So, you're
interested in a horse?"



"Yeah. I'd like to buy that roan," Joxer said,
pointing to a mare taking a drink of water from the
trough.



The trader nodded and they walked over to the mare,
who whickered in greeting. "Oh, yes. This mare is a
good choice. She's in excellent health, good-tempered,
plus she's already been broken to ride." The man
patted the horse's back and Joxer reached out
hesitantly. The mare put her muzzle in Joxer's hand
and he patted it. "That will be one hundred dinars."



Joxer's face fell. "I only have eighty five."



The man shook his head. "One hundred. I'm sorry, I
can't go any lower than that." Joxer tried his best to
get the trader to lower the price but he refused.



"I can get you the money. Can you give me at least an
hour?" Joxer wheedled.



The trader sighed impatiently. "Look, I'm in this
business to make a profit. I won't promise to hold
this horse. If someone comes along and can buy this
horse for the price I'm asking, I'll sell her to that
person, no questions asked."



"All I'm asking for is an hour."



"No. Listen: if the horse is here when you get back
with the rest of the money, she's yours. But if
someone comes back before you do with the money, I'm
selling her."



Joxer took one last look at the mare and hurried away.
He needed a fast way to make fifteen dinars and he
knew of a way. Something he did when he needed money.
He used to gamble but after what happened to him, he
gave it up. Most of the time he would look for a job,
but he didn't have time now so he did what he had to
do when he was in a hurry.



Joxer stopped in the village center, took out his lute
and began to play it. "Listen everyone to my tale of
Gabrielle, the Amazon Queen who rides with Xena, the
Warrior Princess. She's a mighty woman who carries a
big stick." Joxer sang of his friends' heroic deeds.
People threw him dinars as he sang and played. Soon
Joxer had enough money to buy the horse plus get some
treats for the horses. If he enough time to play a bit
longer, he could have gotten enough money to pay back
Xena and Jett, but he knew he had to hurry if he was
to buy that mare. He thanked everybody and hurried
back to the horse trader. "I have the money!" he said
breathlessly, looking around the exercise area for the
mare.



The trader shook his head. "Sorry, but I sold the
horse. Someone else who was willing and had the money
to pay the price I asked for her showed up. Like I
said before, I have to make a living."



Joxer's face fell and he pointed to a handsome gray
stallion proudly trotting around the exercise area.
"What about that stallion? He looks like he'd be easy
to ride."



The trader gasped. "That devil? Are you insane? You
can't tell anything about a horse by how it looks!
Don't you have good horse sense?"



Joxer said no more and walked away. Everything he
tried to do always turned out wrong, he thought to
himself sadly.



"Hey! Wait a minute. Come on back. I might have a
horse for you after all. Come on and I'll show you,"
the trader called out.



Joxer turned around and followed the man around the
back. The man was standing by a spotted gray and white
gelding. It was nice looking and Joxer liked him on
sight. He walked over to it curiously. "He's a fine
looking horse. Why would you keep him out back?" The
horse nuzzled Joxer's ear and he laughed.



The trader replied quickly, "He's a new acquisition -
just got him after you left."



Joxer nodded. "All right. What do you want for him
then?"



"One hundred dinars for him - and don't bother trying
to bargain down."



Joxer nodded and gave the man the money without
protest. The man shook his head. "Son, see if you can
ride him first. He's broken but hasn't been ridden in
a while, from what the previous owner told me."



"No, it's okay. I'll ride him later," Joxer replied
quickly, not wishing to have the trader witness how
badly he mounted a horse. He took the reins, shook the
trader's hand in thanks and headed back to his friends
after making a quick stop at a farm stand for some
carrots and apples. They were going to be so proud of
him, he thought to himself happily.



****



So what kind of a horse do you think he got, Xena?"
asked Gabrielle curiously as they waited for Joxer to
return.



"I don't know Gabrielle, but I'll bet knowing Joxer
that I'll have to take it back and get him one that he
can handle," Xena replied with a sigh.



"I don't believe it!" Jett's voice broke in over their
conversation.



"Don't believe what?" Gabrielle asked curiously.



"My brother actually did something *right* for a
change. That's one nice looking horse!"



Xena and Gabrielle looked in the direction that Jett
was pointing. Joxer was coming up the road leading a
gray and white spotted horse and whistling happily.
Gabrielle ran over to him. "Joxer! You did it! What a
pretty horse!"



Xena walked around the horse with a critical eye,
nodding in approval of what she saw. She smiled at
Joxer. "Joxer, I'm so proud of you. Very nice." She
gave him a little sister-like hug, making him blush.
"This horse has gentle eyes and looks very good
tempered. Have you tried to ride him yet?"



"No. Not yet. Ididn'twantanybodytoseemegetonhim," he
mumbled and Xena nodded in understanding. Joxer
reached into his pocket and gave his horse a carrot.
The horse suddenly made a funny noise after chewing
the treat.



The others stared in surprise. Gabrielle gazed at
Joxer with a very strange look on her face. "Joxer,
what's the matter with your horse? He sounds like he's
sick!"



Joxer shook his head, puzzled at first but then looked
worried. "I don't know. I hope he's not sick. Maybe
the carrot disagreed with him. He looks fine, though."
The horse made another noise, shaking his head. He
then nudged Joxer for more carrots. Joxer obligingly
fed him another carrot. "Hey, I have to save some for
Argo, Thunder and Amber, you know!" he laughed.



Gabrielle was uncertain but she saw the horse was
eating and it didn't appear to be sick. "You're right.
He looks perfectly fine, but I've never heard a horse
make a noise like that before." The horse snorted and
trotted over to Gabrielle, looking for a treat.
Gabrielle laughed as he pushed her gently. "You're
sure a friendly one though - and hungry too." She
patted the horse on the muzzle and gave him an apple
that Joxer hurriedly removed from his backpack



Xena stared at the horse with a strange look on her
face. "I don't think he's a horse. He looks like a
horse, acts like a horse, but sure as Hades doesn't
*sound* like a horse," she said finally.



Jett blinked, frowning at her. "Well then, what IS
he?"



Xena shook her head, turning to the oldest triplet and
shrugging her shoulders. "I'm not sure, but I guess it
doesn't matter as long as Joxer has something to
ride," she said in reply. "Okay, Joxer! Time for you
to learn how to ride and I'll give you your first
lesson today."



"Joxer, what's your horse's name?" Gabrielle asked.



Joxer smiled. "I'd like you to name him, Gabrielle. I
thought maybe Spot would be good, but I'm not sure.
What do you think?"



Gabrielle smiled and walked around the horse. "Well
he's definitely got lots of spots, but Spot is so
*common-sounding*. He needs a special name - something
just for him, different but it would describe
perfectly him at the same time…"



"How about Endless Appetite or Hollow Leg?" Jett
butted in, watching as the horse put his nose in
Joxer's pocket, searching for more carrots.



Xena laughed and Joxer rolled his eyes. "No! Wait a
minute… Let me think… I've got it, Joxer! How about
Speckle?" Gabrielle suggested.



"Speckle? Yeah, I like that," Joxer smiled in
agreement.



The horse made his funny sound again and Jett laughed.
"Sounds like either Speckle wants more carrots or he
agrees with you."



Joxer gave Speckle another carrot. "I think it's
both," he said.



"Joxer, mount up now. It's still daylight and I want
to get a lesson in before dark," Xena said crisply.



"Okay, Xena. Do you like the name?"



"I like it. Speckle's a very good name," Xena said
with a smile.



Joxer stared at Xena then back at his horse. "I don't
seem to have a saddle."



Jett shook his head. "Why didn't you buy one?"



"I didn't have enough money to buy a saddle," Joxer
replied. *Maybe I should have played a little bit
longer after all, but then they would have gotten
suspicious if I had taken too long...*



Jett nodded then looked at Gabrielle. "Hey Gabby, why
don't you let Jox use your saddle?"



Gabrielle glared at him. "Don't call me Gabby!" she
snapped and turned around to face her friend. "Joxer,
you can use my saddle for now until you can get one of
your own."



"Thanks Gabrielle," Joxer said with a grateful smile.




"No problem," Gabrielle returned the smile and got her
saddle.



Xena took the saddle from Gabrielle and placed it on
the ground. "Joxer, pay attention. The first thing you
have to learn is to put on a saddle yourself. You put
on the blanket first. See how it's folded?" Joxer
nodded. Xena then put the saddle on Speckle's back.
"Okay, then you place the saddle over your horse,
making sure that the blanket doesn't move. As you're
strapping the saddle on, make sure your horse is not
holding its breath." As Xena said this, she gave
Speckle a little push in the sides and was pleased to
see that the gelding wasn't holding his breath. "Good
boy," she murmured. "If the horse is holding its
breath, it could fool you into thinking that the cinch
is tight. That should do it, Joxer. Mount up."



Joxer approached Speckle and looked at Xena nervously.
"Okay, I can do this. No problem."



"Take your time, Joxer." Xena waited as Joxer
attempted to mount the horse. After three tries, Joxer
was finally on Speckle. Xena smiled in encouragement.
"Very nice, Joxer. Straighten your posture a bit," she
instructed. "That's better. Okay, now you have to
become one with your horse."

Joxer looked down at her, puzzled. "Become one with my
horse?"



"Yes. You and your horse have to become one. It helps
when you work together and not against each other. Do
you understand what I am saying?"



Joxer nodded. "Yeah, I think I understand what you
mean. It's something that you and Argo have."



"Yes, something like that," Xena agreed.



"Xena, I could never get that from my horse. You and
Argo are really tight."



"Joxer, you can be that way with Speckle too. It just
takes time and patience. Argo and I weren't always
that tight. Right, girl?" Argo whinnied in agreement
and Xena laughed.



"That's hard to believe," Joxer said.



Xena smiled as she mounted Argo. "It's true, though.
Trust me, Joxer. It'll happen. Okay, follow me over
there so you can practice," she pointed to an open
area and had Argo ride over in a slow walk. Joxer
watched Xena carefully as he followed her. The lesson
was hard, but Xena was patient with him and Joxer
showed a marked improvement from his previous riding
attempts. Xena smiled as they drew their horses to a
stop. "You did very well, Joxer. With more practice, I
think you'll make a fine rider. You really lucked out
on Speckle being such an easy-going horse too, even
though he's got the weirdest whinny I've ever heard."
Speckle snorted and Xena laughed. "Let's head back. I
don't know about you, but I'm starving!"



"Thanks, Xena. I'm pretty hungry too," Joxer nodded
and the two rode back to their friends.



"So, how did Joxer do?" Gabrielle asked as they
dismounted and removed the riding gear.



"He did very well, Gabrielle. Speckle is a pretty
laid-back type, so I think Joxer will be fine after
getting over being saddle-sore."



"Good. Well, I guess you two are hungry," Gabrielle
said. "Supper's ready."



"It's more like starving. I never realized that riding
is such hard work! That smells wonderful! Did you cook
it, Gabrielle?" Joxer asked as he and Xena sat down to
eat, Joxer wincing a little as he eased himself onto
the ground.



"Actually, I didn't. Jett did."



Joxer gazed at his brother with a very worried look on
his face. "You made it?"



"Yeah. Want to make something of it?" Jett growled.



"No, not really." Joxer stared down at his food.



"Joxer, there's nothing in it. Not like the last time.
I promise," Jett told him.



"Last time? What last time? What did you do to Joxer's
food, Jett?" Gabrielle asked, gazing down at her own
meal suspiciously.



Joxer broke in before Jett could answer. "Never mind,
Gabrielle. Let's just say it took me a week to eat
again." Xena and Gabrielle laughed at the funny face
Joxer made as he licked his lips and cautiously placed
a spoonful of his meal into his mouth, chewed and
swallowed. He breathed a sigh of relief that he didn't
taste anything strange.



"See? I told you that nothing's in there," Jett
grinned and reached over to give his brother a noogie.
"Besides, it's YOUR night to clean up the dishes!"
Everyone laughed and after supper was over, Joxer was
left to clean up. Before he cleaned the dishes though,
he walked over to Speckle while the others sat around
the fire talking.



"Hey, boy. It looks like you and me are going to be
great friends," Joxer said. Speckle made his strange
noise in agreement. Joxer smiled and gave him some
sugar. Argo, who was standing next to Speckle, nudged
him on the shoulder and he laughed. "Don't worry! I've
got something for all of you!" Joxer petted Argo and
gave her some sugar as well as Thunder and Amber.



"Joxer?"



Joxer jumped and nearly fell. Gabrielle had to do her
best to keep a straight face. "You okay?"



"Yeah, I'm fine."



"Sorry, Joxer. I didn't mean to scare you."



"You didn't scare me."



"Oh, okay. Joxer, do you mind if I ask you something?"




"Sure. What's up?"



Gabrielle waited a moment before she spoke up. "Are
you gambling again?"



"No, Gabrielle! How could you ask me that after what
happened to me? Gods, I get sick looking at dice."



"It's just I that I wondered how you earn your money."




"By hiring myself out – doing odd jobs and stuff."



"Joxer…"



"Look Gabrielle, I may not be as good at things as you
and Xena or Jett are, but I manage just fine. I'm not
gambling or doing anything that will hurt me or get me
into trouble. Trust me."



Gabrielle smiled. "All right, Joxer. I trust you." She
leaned over and gave him a friendly kiss on the cheek.
"Come on, I'll help you with the dishes."



Joxer returned the smile. "Thanks, Gabrielle. I'll be
with you just as soon as I put Speckle to bed."



Gabrielle laughed at Joxer saying he had to put
Speckle to bed. "Okay," she replied as she walked away
after spending a little time with Amber.



Joxer began brushing Speckle with the curry brush Xena
gave him. "You know Speckle, someday I'll tell them
that doing odd jobs isn't the only way how I get my
money. I'd *like* to tell them everything, but…" he
sighed. Speckle made his strange-sounding whinny and
Joxer wondered how long he could keep his singing a
secret.



The End until next time



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> Message: 2
>    Date: Mon, 29 Apr 2002 15:12:06 -0700 (PDT)
>    From: Rebecca Littlehales <esbeckras@...>
> Subject: Re: FF: Lonely this Solstice
>
> --- Jerry Hendy <studmuffin_jer@...> wrote:
> > Came up with an idea for a Solstice Xena short
> story
> > early December, finally finished this morning at
> 21
> > pages - so yet another short story turns into a
> long
> > story(no change there then!).
> > 9_9

> Oh lord... I have to say that, as silly as this was,
> it's one of my favourite stories you've written,
> Jerry :D

Mucho thanks Rebecca, it was a hoot typing it - felt
drained after finally finishing it though.

Well, it falls to few people to include a filk on the
Banana Splits song within a story - guess I'm a bit
wacky as a writer
*g*

> It's sweet by the end and there are so many
>  one-liners that I just loved...
> and I dunno but the pantomime, despite all the
> MASSIVE amounts of sexual innuendo, was adorable ;)

> -Rebecca

Massive sexual innuendo?
<innocent look>
Can't remember them at all...


Cheers,
         Jer - halo slipped a bit
;0)




=====
"A man may fight for many things - his country, his principles, his friends, a
glistening tear on the cheek of a golden child;
Personally however, I'd mudwrestle my own mother for a tonne of cash, an amusing
clock & a sack of french porn!"

Edmund Blackadder, expanding his high-founded reasons for saving the life of The
Prince Regent & duelling with the Duke of Wellington

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Whew!  Quite the epic you have established here so far... I like it,
and you have some great lines and a good story.  Although I have to be
honest and admit the rape stuff makes me massively uncomfortable.
*wince*  I do much like the idea of Aphrodite's Sword... what a
terrible invention!  Ah well.  Please finish - I am highly interested
in seeing what comes next. ^_^

-Rebecca

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Forgot to ask: is it okay for me to archive this at the site?  I'll be
putting it up but if you'd prefer otherwise, let me know and I'll
remove it. ^_^  Thanks!

-Rebecca

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I like to think that, in comparison with last
year, I am doing an admirable job restraining
myself from begging for nominations. ;)  On the
other hand, with all the begging I did do last
year, we had a pretty decent turnout.

In contrast, right now there are two - count 'em,
two - days left in the nomination period; and we
have five people who have nominated
*anything*.... Two of those were tallyists, and
two others only nominated one or two stories
each. So in other words, certain categories
really have no contest here - and others have no
nominees at all.

So, now comes the begging.  Please, even those of
you who may have decided that it's not important
to nominate - please reconsider, and send in your
nominations in the next two days.  This is not
the time to think "someone else will do it",
'cause obviously, someone else is *not*.

To authors: you all should have a big stake in
this.  There is nothing to be ashamed of by
nominating your own stories - other readers might
have forgotten them, never even seen them, or
simply had to decide between them and others in
the same category and just hoped someone else
would nominate them.  You may think it's
egotistical to nominate your own works, but if
you want them to be considered, it's not
egotistical at all.  Don't figure that, if it's
worth being up for an award, someone else will do
it - you can never be sure.  Remember, you DON'T
have to nominate in every category (though we do
really like it when ya do!) - if you only
nominate your own stories, even *that* is
something!

To readers: I know that *some* of you guys are
still reading fanfic, and enjoying it.  Even if
you don't have the time to write back to a fanfic
author when you really liked a story, taking a
few moments to nominate your favourite fanfics
and authors for recognition is a way to give
back.  (Plus it's kinda fun. *g*)  This only
happens once a year - please, participate and
encourage others to do so as well!

The nomination period ends at midnight tomorrow
(Friday) night.  This gives y'all about 38 hours
(as of my writing this - it'll be less for you
guys reading it) to get your nominations in.  If
you were planning on nominating and needed time
to get your ideas together, I respect that, but
don't miss your chance!  You might not get
another one O_O

To nominate, either visit
http://www.thebookcase.org/gqa/nom.html and fill
out the form or send an email of your nominations
to g_gruschow@..., cambellj83@...,
and adobe_lan@... (yes, to all three of us,
it's important).

Thanks,
Rebecca

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--- melalucci@... wrote:

>        Can't you guys give us a little more time?  This is finals
> time (for
> school, I mean), and I really wanted to read some of the fics I
> hadn't got a
> chance to see before I nominated, because I want to be fair.
> ::sigh::  But
> if the deadline is totally set, I guess I'll have to just go based on
> the
> ones I've read.
>        It's just kind of a sucky time for a lot of us in school,
> that's all.
> ^_^

I understand - I really do, having been there a *lot*. ;)  But the
nomination period *was* three weeks long, and it's actually timed so
that the voting period ends on June 1st - it's just an annual thing.
So we really can't extend the deadline.  If you can't nominate 'cause
of school, that's understandable - just do what you can do. :)

-Rebecca

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>I understand - I really do, having been there a *lot*. ;)  But the
>nomination period *was* three weeks long, and it's actually timed so
>that the voting period ends on June 1st - it's just an annual thing.
>So we really can't extend the deadline.  If you can't nominate 'cause
>of school, that's understandable - just do what you can do. :)
>
>-Rebecca

      I understand.  :)  I guess I'm just a little curious as to why it's so
formal, 'cause I think there might be a few more nominations if there wasn't a
super-rigid deadline.  Are a lot of Xena fandoms voting in this, or is it mostly
just JFFG/GJRS people?

Melanie

--- melalucci@... wrote:

>      I understand.  :)  I guess I'm just a little curious as to why
> it's so formal, 'cause I think there might be a few more nominations
> if there wasn't a super-rigid deadline.  Are a lot of Xena fandoms
> voting in this, or is it mostly just JFFG/GJRS people?

Well, we *want* as many fandoms as possible, but it would seem that
only the JFFG/GJRS people are involved enough to be interested. ;)  I
know that Greg posted a message to some forum out there somewhere...
forget which... and apparently it was largely ignored.  Seeing as how
I've given up on attempting to breach *any* kind of fandom I'm not
already in, I'm no help in getting it out there much, either. ;)

You're right that there might be more nominations if there were a more
lax deadline, but there are two important points that can argue that:
First, I think people tend to wait until the last minute, no matter
what that minute is.  If there were an extension, we would *still* get
a flood of nominations in the last two days, no matter how much extra
time had been given.  And second, the deadline *does* need to be firmly
established, because if it isn't the tallyists won't be able to do
their job because they're not going to know when to stop waiting for
more nominations, and start putting together the voting ballot.

Best answer I can give ya; if you do want to really lobby for an
extension then the person to talk to is Greg.  He makes the rules, so
he'd be the one to change them. *g*

-Rebecca

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Hi

I hope this is okay

I am in another fan group where  we used to have an
awards too but this year no one vote except two people
and we have over 500 people so they cancel it. I
really don't want to see this cancel.

Thank you

Susie

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Here is all the Xena stuff I've written in the past year.

Jenn

----------

The Heir Up There
Part 3 in the Twist of Fate series

Summary: Xena and Ares' daughter Millie hates the constant late-night travel
and the hardships she's endured living on the road for the 12 years she's
been alive.  She knows her parents are running from something bad -
something bad that wants her.  She longs to have a friend, one that won't
torment her like big-sister Eve or other village girls her age.  But when
she happens to meet and befriend Virgil and Solan, Joxer and Gabrielle's
sons, a prophecy is set into motion - one that could ultimately destroy her.
An AU story.

I don't have this story online anywhere, but it's in the archives of the
lists I'm sending this message to.

----------

Better Than Imagined (EROTICA: MUST BE 18 OR OVER TO READ)

Summary: In a moment of sexual frenzy, Gabrielle tries to seduce Joxer, but
when he rebuffs her advances, she begins to question her attractiveness.

http://gabrielleandjoxer.com/gje/Stories/BetterThanImagined.htm

----------

Everything Falls Apart

Summary: Xena, Gabrielle and Joxer chase this week's bad guy all the way to
Japan, and into the Iron Chef's Kitchen Stadium.  Submitted to GJRS for the
Crossover Lyrics Challenge

http://www.crosswinds.net/~lyricsarchive/round12/jenn12.html

----------

Guise Will Be Guise: Lookalikes in XWP

Summary: An article from the Whoosh October 2001 issue highlighting the
Xena, Joxer and Gabrielle lookalikes and how they relate to the main
characters they look like and to each other.

http://www.whoosh.org/issue61/brouillard1.html

Thank you for taking the time to nominate. As soon as everything is
counted, I'll post the voting list, so stay tuned.

  Greg Gruschow
  GQA Trailboss

About six months or so of letting the idea fester
in the back of my head, then a single day of
considering it, beginning with the sudden idea
for the opening line, and the next thing you
know, the durn thing is written. :P  Yeah that's
right - new fic.  TINY new fic, but it's new.
It's also sad, very sad, major downer of a tiny
new fic, this one.

Feedback is like - the greatest thing EVER.
Please give. *g*

Never
by Xebbie

Rating: PG
Spoilers: Nearly all Joxer eps of season five.
Genre: melodrama, teeny vignette, G/J romance
(sort of)
Author's notes: Revisionist history! Yah!  I take
dramatic license with a good deal of Gab's
feelings on a good deal of season five.  And why
shouldn't I? ;P

*****

If anyone were to ask Gabrielle about it, she
would lie.

One way or another - astonishment, ignorance,
amusement, anger - in truth, all these were
methods of denial, used to mask the one important
truth.

The thing was, love wasn't an option for her.
She'd tried it, and it hadn't worked; love had
left her with blood on her hands, the sole bearer
of the memories of the men she'd taken into her
heart.  She'd seen too many funerals, and felt
too many heartbreaks, and finally decided: never
again.

And then Joxer, damn him, had fallen in love with
her.

She'd tried so hard to convince herself that he
hadn't; that it was in her imagination.  When
that failed, she set her efforts to pushing him
away - through abuse, through neglect, through
the tried-but-true "can we always be friends"
routine.  But the damned idiot kept coming back.

She didn't know which had happened first: his
feelings for her, or hers for him.  Knowing,
however, wouldn't make it easier; wouldn't change
her mind.  It didn't matter who had loved who
longer - would that change the facts now?  That
she loved him, that it put him in danger, that he
could never even *know* of her feelings?

None of it changed; none of it could.  So she
hid, set her feelings behind a mask of hostility,
hoped that she could spare his life by not
sparing his feelings.  At least, she told herself
- when she allowed herself to think about it, on
those rare occasions late at night - she could
keep him this way, and love him in her own way,
on her own terms.  Not have to fear for him, stay
awake nights afraid that he'd fall in battle the
next day, or catch an arrow meant for her, or -
with his luck - fall on his sword and gut
himself.

Now, she could rest.

And then, it started to go wrong.  The idyllic
existence she'd captured for the briefest of
months was shattered - he told her his feelings,
forcing her to openly reject him.  He flirted
with other women, succeeding in making her
jealous despite her attempts at staying detached.
  And he nearly destroyed her by asking - on the
brink of death, no less - why she couldn't love
him.  So close to losing him, she'd been
desperate to confess, to say it *once* before
they were separated - "I do love you..."

But the words died on her lips, as it occurred to
her that admitting it would be sealing his fate -
but, by the same token, denying it might still
save him.  Desperately, she pushed out an
addendum, "Just... not the way you want it, I
guess."

He recovered.  They never spoke of it again.

She hated herself.

And then the kiss.  The kiss on the pier -
waking, finding him so close, not sure of what
reality was; she'd realized too late what she was
doing, and in the end pushed him away too
harshly, too quickly.  She was weakening, her
resolve was cracking a bit at a time, even though
she knew from terrible experience that a short
happiness was barely worth the pain of loss.

But... she was losing him.  She felt it.  She
couldn't blame him, but still, she didn't know if
she could bear to have him move on... She could
live without having him, without a consummated
relationship, but not without *him*.  Her
behaviour became extreme, in attempts to keep his
attention, to pry admissions of love from him.
At the Amazon village she went so far as to make
him swear alliegance to her, which he did without
a touch of romance in his manner at all.

She broke down on the way back from Egypt, and
confessed to Xena.  "Tell him," her friend
instructed - no nonsense, no room for argument,
you've been stupid for waiting this long.  "It's
not that simple," Gabrielle tried to explain, but
Xena couldn't see.  And coming out of her mouth,
at long last spoken aloud, Gabrielle's certainty
of an unbreakable curse on her suitors faltered
for the first time.  It *did* sound strange, she
found, as she told Xena... Maybe there was no
more danger for Joxer than there was in his daily
life.  Maybe, between herself and Xena, they
could protect him.

Maybe the time together *was* worth the pain of
the loss; better that, than to never love at all.

"I'll tell him tomorrow," she said.

Indeterminable years passed at a frozen pace, and
she lost him to the irreversability of time.
Aged, bent, white-haired and weakened, he was
still Joxer.  And he died for her.

She dealt with it the only way she could; to
forget.  At Xena's urging she forgave Eve; "Then
you can heal," Xena told her gently.  But she
didn't heal.  She shut it out.  It was easy;
twenty-five years had passed, and so few things
were the same now.  All she had to remember Joxer
by were a few scrolls, easily destroyed in a
fire; his farm and restaurant were foreign to
her, and his son could have been any young man
whose father died at the end of a warlord's
sword.  Joxer who?

Gabrielle's past was long gone, and the Gabrielle
who lived in it was gone with it.  She lived,
from then on, for the present and the future;
thought of few things from the time before, and
spoke of them even less.

Sometimes, at night, she dreamed of a lanky young
man with spiky, dark hair, foolish armour, and an
infectious grin.  But if anyone were to ask her
about it, she would lie.



=====
"It's not easy being a single parent... juggling a family and a career, like so
many juggling balls... Two, I suppose..."

__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
LAUNCH - Your Yahoo! Music Experience
http://launch.yahoo.com

Hi Guys,

The 8th Gathering of the fans will be on:

8th June, Saturday,
At Istvan's Cafe- Waverly.

See you, Chloe.

_________________________________________________________________
Chat with friends online, try MSN Messenger: http://messenger.msn.com

--- Xebbie <adobe_lan@...> wrote:
> About six months or so of letting the idea fester
> in the back of my head, then a single day of
> considering it, beginning with the sudden idea
> for the opening line, and the next thing you
> know, the durn thing is written. :P  Yeah that's
> right - new fic.  TINY new fic, but it's new.
> It's also sad, very sad, major downer of a tiny
> new fic, this one.
>
> Feedback is like - the greatest thing EVER.
> Please give. *g*
>
> Never
> by Xebbie


***  This has been the first fanfic I've read in ages!  You've always
been a great writer Xeb... and this time was no different. :)  Nicely
done!
Take care
Annie B.

=====
Why is it when snooty department stores put their Christmas decorations out just
after the 4th of July, it's "elegant foresight," but when I leave my Christmas
lights up until April, my neighbors just think I'm tacky?

__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
LAUNCH - Your Yahoo! Music Experience
http://launch.yahoo.com

Wow Xebbie! That was an intense piece of work. I enjoyed it very much, though
it was sad, but touching, too.
Thanks,
Xedra

If you've been waiting for the voting list, all I can say is -
oops, my bad. I seem to have missed the JFFG while I was posting it.
   Don't worry though, there is still *plenty* of time to vote.


   The Voting Period is now open. Remember, each catagory can have
only a
single vote so consider your choice carefully <g>
   Once you have finished, please send the completed list to the
Tallyists.
   Thank you and happy voting!

   Greg Gruschow
   GQA Trailboss


   Greg

G_Gruschow@...


Rebecca

adobe_lan@...


Jennifer
campbellj83@...



Best dramatic story:

  Let My Love Open the Door by Jennifer Campbell
  The Things We Do For Love by Xebbie
  Looking Through Your Eyes by L.J. Paxton
  Female of the Species by Seriana
  Matter of Amazon Honor by Phil Hernandez
  The Fourteenth Year, by Seriana


Best Comedic story

  All about Eve by Melissa Flores
  Joxer's Kisses by Nancy Lorenz
  A Knight's Tale by Jerry Hendy
  Lonely This Solstice by Jerry Hendy
  Happy Halloween by Susan Owens



Best Vignette

  The bells tolled for me  by Seriana Ritani
  Ghost Riders in the Sky by Raye
  So Long by Kawcrow
  The 155-Word Uber Story with the Worst Pun Ever, by Phil Hernandez


Best Uber

  The mixed up girl by Melanie Lakey
  Banding Together by Trfan
  If I Fall by Tricia Stewart
  Minstrellations by trfan
  Don't Dream It's Over by Greg Gruschow


Best novella

   The Changing of the Guard by Dharma Bum
   The Heir Up There by Jennifer Brouillard
   My Cup Runneth Over by Susan Owens
   Things We Do For Love by Xebbie


Best subtext

  Xena: The End by Lena
  "Changes" by trfan


Best slash

  Ares' Defender by Sorka


Best crossover
   King of Pain by Jennifer Campbell
   Everything Falls Apart by Jennifer Brouillard
   When the Night Falls by Dharma Bum



Best parody

  On His Tod by Jerry Hendy
  A Knight's Tale by Jerry Hendy
  Words of the Gods by Danii


Best erotic

   Better Than Imagined by Jenny Kate
   Associated Lust by Moire
   Post-Mortem, Dharma Bum
   Delayed Reactions by Dharma Bum


Best series

  Miracle Child series by Seriana
  Twist of Fate by Jennifer Brouillard
  The Parole Series by Susan Owens
  A Moment in Time Series by Melissa Flores



Best unfinished

  Spring Fever by Denise Romesburg
   A Matter of Amazon Honor by Phil Hernandez
   An Arcadian Werewolf in Egypt by Danii
   The Trio and Their Uncle, by Susan Owens


Best poem

  Letter to a Friend by Tabs
  Untitled by Allison Garrett
  Joxer's Heart by Xedra


Best filk

  Jox by Findley K. Boyd
  All Dead, All Dead by Mysa
  How Are We Supposed to Live Without You? by Ali
  Don't Come Along Twice by Suzanne Smiley


Original character

1. Millie, in "The Heir Up There" by Jennifer Brouillard
2. Solan, in "The Heir Up There" by Jennifer Brouillard
3. Sulieman, Dharma Bum
4. Arose, from Susan Owens


Best author

   Dharma Bum
   Seriana
   Susan Owens
   Jennifer Brouillard



Best article

  "Guise Will be Guise: Lookalikes in Xena: Warrior Princess" by
Jennifer K.
Brouillard
  "Joxer: Soulmate or Stalker?" by Janet Elizabeth Swainston



Best archive

   JFFG
   The Bookcase
  GJErotica
   The Lyrics Challenge Archive
   Xebbie's Xena Xone

Hmmm... well, it would seem that, without warning, FortuneCity has
taken our domain name away from us.  Which I guess I can't really fault
them for, after all they provided it for free; but it does mean that I
now have to make the effort to remember the original URL for the site.
Grumble. ;P

For those who don't yet have it bookmarked and were - like me - relying
on the simple-to-remember domain name, it's at
http://www.fortunecity.com/lavender/friday/644/index.html.  The shorter
version, and easier to remember, is
http://members.fortunecity.com/jffg/index.html.

Anyway... the free domain name was really my only reason for
permanently staying with FortuneCity, and as of late they've been
changing their package deals etc in ways that have made me a bit
nervous.  I'm still more than a little worried that they're going to
reneg on the deal I signed up for - which was 100 megs of space for
free - and cut it down to what they're offering now, which I believe
was 20 megs.  The fact that they discontinued the domain name makes me
worry more.  As of right now we're at about 26 or so megs - still more
than low enough to fit at a Tripod site or something like it.

Now the question is, what's the general consensus here?  FortuneCity
has had its share of bugs in the past - cutting off HTML files here,
not loading images there, including the background images at times
(instead it just gives a huge "fortunecity" symbol, very nice, I'm
sure).  But on the other hand, they haven't shown any signs of cutting
back on our space so far, and it's been something like a year since
they changed their service packages.  And there is something to be said
about having a permanent home for the site.

So, I'm turning to the list here for guidance: should I switch to
another server, or stay where we are until we are forced to move by
discontinuation of service?

Any shared opinions will be welcome. ^_^  Thanks!

-Rebecca

__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
LAUNCH - Your Yahoo! Music Experience
http://launch.yahoo.com

Or you could just move the site over to Geocities...Yes, I know the pop ups are annoying. But the page builder programs they have can make archiving just about idiot proof. (-I'm- not the one archiving over at Guilty Pleasures, but I did set it up so Eph and Cordy could do it.)

I say stay here as long as they're not giving us too much flak, but keep
copies of the html somewhere safe!  I've had other servers konk out on me
and to have no html is an absolute nightmare.  Just . . . be ready to move,
if we need it.

If getting our own webspace seems like a good idea I will happily donate my
share to the Save the Rare Endangered JFFG Fund.

Seri

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