REJECTED NURSERY RHYMES
JACK AND JILL
Went up the hill
To have a little fun.
Stupid Jill
Forgot the pill
And now they have a son.
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MARY HAD A LITTLE  LAMB
Her father shot it  dead
Now it goes to  school with her,
Between two hunks of bread.
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LITTLE MISS MUFFET Sat on a tuffet,
Her clothes all tattered and torn.
It had not been the spider
that crept up beside her
But Little Boy Blue and his horn.
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SIMPLE SIMON
Met a Pieman going to  the fair
Said Simple Simon to  the Pieman
"What have you got  there?"
Said the Pieman unto Simon
"Pies, you dumbass!"
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HUMPTY DUMPTY Sat on a wall.
Humpty dumpty had a great fall.
All the king''s  horses & all the kings' men
Had scrambled eggs  for breakfast again.
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HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE,
The cat did a piddle,
All over the bedside  clock,
The little dog laughed
to see such fun
When it died of  electric shock.
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GEORGIE PORGY Pudding and Pie
Kissed the girls and  made them cry.
When the boys came out  to play
He kissed them, too, 'cause he was gay.
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ONCE THERE WAS A LITTLE  GIRL
who had a little curl!
Right in the middle of  her head
And when she was good,
She was very very good
But when she was bad
she got a Fur coat, jewels, and  a sports car.