Hi there. I am an avid fan of SuperNanny like everyone here. There is
a problem I have with my 7 yr old that the show hasn't addressed so
I'm reaching out to you folks to see if any have ideas for me.  My
daughter is extremely bright, creative and mostly well-behaved....at
least she seems an angel in comparison to those on the show. Her main
problem (or more correctly MY MAIN PROBLEM..) is she dawdles. She
wastes soooooooooo much time doing whatever that she has no time for
cuddling, reading, playing or anything else. Now mind you, I've tried
both negative and positive approaches to this problem. We did a
reward system and made it fairly easy for her to attain rewards but
it didn't seem to interest her much further than a 2 wk span.
Negative gets us nowhere because she just "forgets" so much. She is
NOT ADD. She has proven periodically that she can do things quickly
but she basically needs a set of blinders to wear to help her. Now
it's starting to affect her at school as well. She just can't help
being so social. She gets up w/out asking, she talks to other kids
when she is to be quiet etc. Now some of this I know is normal kid
stuff and I don't expect her to be perfect but she is so extreme slow
it really stresses one out. When she does things right or
quickly....I am so quick to praise her. She somehow subconsciencely
thrives on the negative attention I think. Any ideas on how to use
the supernanny tecniques or similar to help with the remembering and
the focusing?
Suga

Hi Misty~

My name is Debbie and I'm also new to this group. I don't have any
children personally, but work with toddlers ages 18 months to 4 yrs
every day. I have had some experience creating schedules for the
families I work with, and may be able to help you set up one for
yourself.
The naughty stool/mat/room etc...is a wonderful way to discipline.
You can ask me any questions you may have on this technique. I can't
guarantee I'll know the answers, but I'll give it a go!

Happy Parenting everyone!
Debbie







--- In Supernanny@yahoogroups.com, "Misty Dawn"
<littlecurlylocks@p...> wrote:
> Hi My name is Misty and i have 4 children- Hannah 51\2, Josiah
will be 4 March 31, Isaiah will be 2 Feb. 14 and Abigail 3 months
born Oct 19, 2004
> On Suppernanny Jo brings in a scheduel for the family to give them
orginized. I an not orginized at all I never no what to do during
the day with my children or when to clean the house.  My children ar
not as bad as the ones on the show, but the have there share of
fighting with each other. I also dont know how to use the naughty
stool . I need help to make a schedual  and how to use the naughty
stool  can anyone help me. Misty-Fontana,CA.

Hi my name is Vicki I have a 3yr old with a b-day coming up soon.I
love supernanny! We are working with my 3 yrold emilee now to get her
out of the hitting,grabbing,screaming. Our biggest problem is she is
still sleeping in our bed she had alot of medical problems as a baby
and we felt safer with her in our room now she is getting so big that
its rough sleeping with her.I want to get her moved to her own room
but dont know about how to do it calmly as possible.
   One of our other main concerns is she sleep walks some nights we
have took her to several DR and they all said that she will out grow
it(this is one reason she is still in our room).if anyone has any
possible solution to help please I would greatly appriate it
Thanks
vicki

There are a number of things mentioned here, naughty
stool/corner/room/mat - timeouts, a coin reward jar - bulletin of
consequences, different consequences for different behaviours, (
assume according to the severity of the bad behaviour) video-taping
the child, and now seeking outside resources through the school.

The main thing is consistency, and all of those different techniques
are overwhelming to list, so imagine how overwhelming they are to a
six year old. I know you are not doing them necessarily all at once
but you
do not mention how long you have tried each technique before
dismissing it. It takes consistency + time to make it work.

And lastly, other than getting money to buy toys, you do not mention
giving any positive verbal praise for GOOD behaviour. That one may
just be the key. She will be so interested in receiving the positive
feedback that she will look for ways to get it from you and there
will be less bad behaviour.

Well, just my thoughts. Take care,
Daisyschicken


P.S. Didnt know SuperNanny had a book out, I will be looking for it,
thx!


--- In Supernanny@yahoogroups.com, "anizzia" <anizzia@y...> wrote:
>
> Hi,
> Thank you for the imput.I will keep trying the chair over the
room.
> I have tried a naughty chair and she was still getting off from it-
> she actually said she would just sleep on it before she would
listen
> and appologize. I have also tried video taping her to show her how
> she looked and sounded and she got extremely upset. She knows she
> looks/sounds bad and does not want to see it. I think she was
> embarassed. She is a very senstive girl and at school or knew
> situations shy. Over all both kids are good kids and people always
> comment on how well behaved they are. My daughter has always been
> strong willed but not this disrespectful. I've always had to watch
> how I talked to her because what I say is regurgitated right back
at
> me. Its those periods of discipline that my daughter just "looses
> it" and becomes this totally irrational tyrant. I know all parents
> go through ups and downs, but trying to find the right way to
handel
> it is not always easy. I do think I will talk to her school
> councelor about helping her manage her temper... and see if that
> helps. We have not had a hitting episode since my first e-mail, but
> my daughter still trys to argue with me when explain/remind her of
> the rules. She begins to raise her voice and points out what she
> sees wrong in the situation, so she is really trying to battle for
> control.  Wish me luck! and thanks again.
> Abbie
> --- In Supernanny@yahoogroups.com, "menke442" <iloveolds@c...>
wrote:
> >
> > Hi Abbie,
> > Maybe she can't handle being alone in the room........?  Like the
> > other poster wrote, maybe try just the naughty mat/chair/stool
> idea.
> > Also, have you checked with her doctor to see if anything is wrong
> > physically?
> > Also, my best friend had suggested that we video-tape our girls,
> aged
> > 9, to show them exactly what they look like and how they sound
when
> > having a "fit."  I have yet to try this one, but just might in the
> > near future.  I don't think they realize how "ugly" they look when
> > they are like that.
> >
> > Deanna
> >
> > --- In Supernanny@yahoogroups.com, "anizzia" <anizzia@y...> wrote:
> > >
> > > Hi,
> > > I have a 3 year old boy and a 6 year old daughter both have
> > > birthdays coming up in March. I am an educated mother and a
> special
> > > education teacher who deals with managing behaviors daily in my
> > > classroom, but my six year old daughter is making me feel
> absolutely
> > > helpless and completely incapable of parenting.  She has always
> been
> > > strong willed, but more recently her sassing has increased and
> is
> > > now beginging to move toward physical outbursts.  After
watching
> > > Super Nanny and Nanny 911, I have been craacking down more on
> the
> > > sassing, not listening...and being more consistant.
> > > Both kids have a jar they decorated that they put coins in they
> earn
> > > for picking up, brushing teeth, being good....If they
> misbehave...
> > > they will lose coins. At the end of the week we go to the store
> and
> > > they can by a treat with the coins they've earned.  I also sat
> down
> > > with my daughter and made a list of rules/expectations followed
> by
> > > consequences for breaking those rules. The rules were things
> like;
> > > no sassing-talk with respect, hands to your own body-no
hitting,
> no
> > > yelling/screaming, no slamming doors, nice to others... the
> > > consequences were 1st loose coins or go to time out depending
on
> > > what they did. Putting my daughter in timeout has become an
> absolute
> > > battle. I watched the last 2 episodes of super nanny with the
> twin
> > > girls and the little boy who called his parents poo poo head. I
> am
> > > following Jo's advice and putting my daughter in a naughty room
> and
> > > walking away and ignoring inappropriate behavior. BUT this has
> > > lasted over and hour at times. I do not take more than 15 steps
> and
> > > she is at my heals, I turn around put her back without saying
> > > anything and it happens again and again I'm talking over 30
> times
> > > and while I am putting her back she has started to call me
names
> > > like stupid idiot, fat rat, I hate you... and has begun to hit
> me
> > > when my back is turned or hit my arms while I place her back in
> the
> > > room. I am absolutely mortified. It is like she fully looses
> control
> > > and snaps. I am aware that behaviors can esculate before they
> > > decrease when a behavior plan is started, but she is almost 7
> and
> > > the names she calls me and the hitting is soooo inappropriate I
> just
> > > do not know if the timeouts are the right thing to do??? The
> second
> > > part of her consequence chart stated if she does these things
in
> > > time out she looses play time with friends and TV for the day.
> So
> > > she does have a consequence for the behavior after the fact
> (since
> > > in the heat of the moment she can not be rationalized with and
I
> > > am "ignoring" her efforts for attention)but what about while
the
> > > timeout is going on? What do I do about the name calling and
> > > hitting, kicking...?
> > > Any thought are all very welcome.
> > >
> > > Abbie

Hi,
Thank you for the imput.I will keep trying the chair over the room.
I have tried a naughty chair and she was still getting off from it-
she actually said she would just sleep on it before she would listen
and appologize. I have also tried video taping her to show her how
she looked and sounded and she got extremely upset. She knows she
looks/sounds bad and does not want to see it. I think she was
embarassed. She is a very senstive girl and at school or knew
situations shy. Over all both kids are good kids and people always
comment on how well behaved they are. My daughter has always been
strong willed but not this disrespectful. I've always had to watch
how I talked to her because what I say is regurgitated right back at
me. Its those periods of discipline that my daughter just "looses
it" and becomes this totally irrational tyrant. I know all parents
go through ups and downs, but trying to find the right way to handel
it is not always easy. I do think I will talk to her school
councelor about helping her manage her temper... and see if that
helps. We have not had a hitting episode since my first e-mail, but
my daughter still trys to argue with me when explain/remind her of
the rules. She begins to raise her voice and points out what she
sees wrong in the situation, so she is really trying to battle for
control.  Wish me luck! and thanks again.
Abbie
--- In Supernanny@yahoogroups.com, "menke442" <iloveolds@c...> wrote:
>
> Hi Abbie,
> Maybe she can't handle being alone in the room........?  Like the
> other poster wrote, maybe try just the naughty mat/chair/stool
idea.
> Also, have you checked with her doctor to see if anything is wrong
> physically?
> Also, my best friend had suggested that we video-tape our girls,
aged
> 9, to show them exactly what they look like and how they sound when
> having a "fit."  I have yet to try this one, but just might in the
> near future.  I don't think they realize how "ugly" they look when
> they are like that.
>
> Deanna
>
> --- In Supernanny@yahoogroups.com, "anizzia" <anizzia@y...> wrote:
> >
> > Hi,
> > I have a 3 year old boy and a 6 year old daughter both have
> > birthdays coming up in March. I am an educated mother and a
special
> > education teacher who deals with managing behaviors daily in my
> > classroom, but my six year old daughter is making me feel
absolutely
> > helpless and completely incapable of parenting.  She has always
been
> > strong willed, but more recently her sassing has increased and
is
> > now beginging to move toward physical outbursts.  After watching
> > Super Nanny and Nanny 911, I have been craacking down more on
the
> > sassing, not listening...and being more consistant.
> > Both kids have a jar they decorated that they put coins in they
earn
> > for picking up, brushing teeth, being good....If they
misbehave...
> > they will lose coins. At the end of the week we go to the store
and
> > they can by a treat with the coins they've earned.  I also sat
down
> > with my daughter and made a list of rules/expectations followed
by
> > consequences for breaking those rules. The rules were things
like;
> > no sassing-talk with respect, hands to your own body-no hitting,
no
> > yelling/screaming, no slamming doors, nice to others... the
> > consequences were 1st loose coins or go to time out depending on
> > what they did. Putting my daughter in timeout has become an
absolute
> > battle. I watched the last 2 episodes of super nanny with the
twin
> > girls and the little boy who called his parents poo poo head. I
am
> > following Jo's advice and putting my daughter in a naughty room
and
> > walking away and ignoring inappropriate behavior. BUT this has
> > lasted over and hour at times. I do not take more than 15 steps
and
> > she is at my heals, I turn around put her back without saying
> > anything and it happens again and again I'm talking over 30
times
> > and while I am putting her back she has started to call me names
> > like stupid idiot, fat rat, I hate you... and has begun to hit
me
> > when my back is turned or hit my arms while I place her back in
the
> > room. I am absolutely mortified. It is like she fully looses
control
> > and snaps. I am aware that behaviors can esculate before they
> > decrease when a behavior plan is started, but she is almost 7
and
> > the names she calls me and the hitting is soooo inappropriate I
just
> > do not know if the timeouts are the right thing to do??? The
second
> > part of her consequence chart stated if she does these things in
> > time out she looses play time with friends and TV for the day.
So
> > she does have a consequence for the behavior after the fact
(since
> > in the heat of the moment she can not be rationalized with and I
> > am "ignoring" her efforts for attention)but what about while the
> > timeout is going on? What do I do about the name calling and
> > hitting, kicking...?
> > Any thought are all very welcome.
> >
> > Abbie

Hi Abbie,
Maybe she can't handle being alone in the room........?  Like the
other poster wrote, maybe try just the naughty mat/chair/stool idea.
Also, have you checked with her doctor to see if anything is wrong
physically?
Also, my best friend had suggested that we video-tape our girls, aged
9, to show them exactly what they look like and how they sound when
having a "fit."  I have yet to try this one, but just might in the
near future.  I don't think they realize how "ugly" they look when
they are like that.

Deanna

--- In Supernanny@yahoogroups.com, "anizzia" <anizzia@y...> wrote:
>
> Hi,
> I have a 3 year old boy and a 6 year old daughter both have
> birthdays coming up in March. I am an educated mother and a special
> education teacher who deals with managing behaviors daily in my
> classroom, but my six year old daughter is making me feel absolutely
> helpless and completely incapable of parenting.  She has always been
> strong willed, but more recently her sassing has increased and is
> now beginging to move toward physical outbursts.  After watching
> Super Nanny and Nanny 911, I have been craacking down more on the
> sassing, not listening...and being more consistant.
> Both kids have a jar they decorated that they put coins in they earn
> for picking up, brushing teeth, being good....If they misbehave...
> they will lose coins. At the end of the week we go to the store and
> they can by a treat with the coins they've earned.  I also sat down
> with my daughter and made a list of rules/expectations followed by
> consequences for breaking those rules. The rules were things like;
> no sassing-talk with respect, hands to your own body-no hitting, no
> yelling/screaming, no slamming doors, nice to others... the
> consequences were 1st loose coins or go to time out depending on
> what they did. Putting my daughter in timeout has become an absolute
> battle. I watched the last 2 episodes of super nanny with the twin
> girls and the little boy who called his parents poo poo head. I am
> following Jo's advice and putting my daughter in a naughty room and
> walking away and ignoring inappropriate behavior. BUT this has
> lasted over and hour at times. I do not take more than 15 steps and
> she is at my heals, I turn around put her back without saying
> anything and it happens again and again I'm talking over 30 times
> and while I am putting her back she has started to call me names
> like stupid idiot, fat rat, I hate you... and has begun to hit me
> when my back is turned or hit my arms while I place her back in the
> room. I am absolutely mortified. It is like she fully looses control
> and snaps. I am aware that behaviors can esculate before they
> decrease when a behavior plan is started, but she is almost 7 and
> the names she calls me and the hitting is soooo inappropriate I just
> do not know if the timeouts are the right thing to do??? The second
> part of her consequence chart stated if she does these things in
> time out she looses play time with friends and TV for the day.  So
> she does have a consequence for the behavior after the fact (since
> in the heat of the moment she can not be rationalized with and I
> am "ignoring" her efforts for attention)but what about while the
> timeout is going on? What do I do about the name calling and
> hitting, kicking...?
> Any thought are all very welcome.
>
> Abbie

Maybe try a naughty corner as opposed to a naughty room?

Dianna


On 2/17/05 1:26 PM, "Abbie Nizzia" <anizzia@...> wrote:

> I forgot to explain that after my daughter finally
> stays in the naughty room for the 6 minutes, I go in
> begin to tell her the behavior was inapproriate... and
> she immediately covers her ears and will not
> apologize. So I tell her timeout starts again. This is
> the why the timeouts last so long along with her not
> staying in room as I explained in the earlier message.
> Does Jo's book discuss any of thses issues, or if
> anybody has an opinion feel free to share.
> Thanks again,
> Abbie
>

I forgot to explain that after my daughter finally
stays in the naughty room for the 6 minutes, I go in
begin to tell her the behavior was inapproriate... and
she immediately covers her ears and will not
apologize. So I tell her timeout starts again. This is
the why the timeouts last so long along with her not
staying in room as I explained in the earlier message.
Does Jo's book discuss any of thses issues, or if
anybody has an opinion feel free to share.
Thanks again,
Abbie



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Hi,
I have a 3 year old boy and a 6 year old daughter both have
birthdays coming up in March. I am an educated mother and a special
education teacher who deals with managing behaviors daily in my
classroom, but my six year old daughter is making me feel absolutely
helpless and completely incapable of parenting.  She has always been
strong willed, but more recently her sassing has increased and is
now beginging to move toward physical outbursts.  After watching
Super Nanny and Nanny 911, I have been craacking down more on the
sassing, not listening...and being more consistant.
Both kids have a jar they decorated that they put coins in they earn
for picking up, brushing teeth, being good....If they misbehave...
they will lose coins. At the end of the week we go to the store and
they can by a treat with the coins they've earned.  I also sat down
with my daughter and made a list of rules/expectations followed by
consequences for breaking those rules. The rules were things like;
no sassing-talk with respect, hands to your own body-no hitting, no
yelling/screaming, no slamming doors, nice to others... the
consequences were 1st loose coins or go to time out depending on
what they did. Putting my daughter in timeout has become an absolute
battle. I watched the last 2 episodes of super nanny with the twin
girls and the little boy who called his parents poo poo head. I am
following Jo's advice and putting my daughter in a naughty room and
walking away and ignoring inappropriate behavior. BUT this has
lasted over and hour at times. I do not take more than 15 steps and
she is at my heals, I turn around put her back without saying
anything and it happens again and again I'm talking over 30 times
and while I am putting her back she has started to call me names
like stupid idiot, fat rat, I hate you... and has begun to hit me
when my back is turned or hit my arms while I place her back in the
room. I am absolutely mortified. It is like she fully looses control
and snaps. I am aware that behaviors can esculate before they
decrease when a behavior plan is started, but she is almost 7 and
the names she calls me and the hitting is soooo inappropriate I just
do not know if the timeouts are the right thing to do??? The second
part of her consequence chart stated if she does these things in
time out she looses play time with friends and TV for the day.  So
she does have a consequence for the behavior after the fact (since
in the heat of the moment she can not be rationalized with and I
am "ignoring" her efforts for attention)but what about while the
timeout is going on? What do I do about the name calling and
hitting, kicking...?
Any thought are all very welcome.

Abbie

When my daughter picked up a knife from the low cutting board at my mom's
house (they're not used to toddlers!) My husband saw Maylie with the knife
before anyone else did.  He said "DON'T MOVE." and it was the tone of his
voice that grabbed her attention.  She didn't move, and he took the knife
away.  Then she started bawling her eyes out.  (She is 25 months old).

There are other ways to grab a toddler's attention than by slapping their
hand. I just feel that it teaches them that it's OK to hit... They can't
tell the difference between a slap and a hit, and if it's OK for mommy to do
it then it must be OK for them to do it too.  I usually grab Maylie's arm
which both gets her attention and keeps her from touching what she's not
supposed to.  Now that she's 2, she's starting to really understand things a
bit more and I can treat her differently than when she was 12-18 mos old and
didn't understand nearly as much.  So instead of just grabbing her arm and
saying no, don't touch that. I can explain that it's sharp and it can hurt
you so don't touch it.

She still informs me "pin ow." whenever she sees my sewing pins. Haha.

Dianna

I agree with diannagregory.  When a storm in coming or is in progress,
me and my daughter (9) get online and check the dopplar radar.  I show
her where we are and which way the storm is going, where the strong
areas are and then I show her where the clear area is, so she knows
that there IS an end to the storm.  When she complains about the
storm, I can tell her "It's almost over us" and she understands.  I've
found that this really helps her to settle down and just wait.

--- In Supernanny@yahoogroups.com, "iaozoo" <iaozoo@y...> wrote:
>
> Supernanny !
>
> My wife and I have a 2 year old daughter, who up until a couple of
> weeks ago slept with us at night.  We have been trying to train her
> to sleep in her own room, in her own bed at night.
>
> At first we tried the technique shown on the program with the twin
> girls, and placed her in bed, gave her a hug and kiss, an then
> left.  When she can our of the room, we returned her, and eventually
> this worked to get her to sleep.
>
> The problem is that we live about 3 miles from some rail road
> tracks , and my daughter is afraid of the train.  Everything a train
> goes by in the night; she wakes up and comes to our room, crying
> that she is afraid of the train.  I believe her fear is real,
> because she is afraid of the train in the day time too.  This
> happens about 10 times a night.
>
> We tried the technique, used in the show with the little boy who was
> climbing out of his crib, and sat next to her bed, when we returned
> her to sleep.  This seemed to calm her, but this happens as
> mentioned about 10 times a night.
>
> We also tried to place a radio in the bed room, so that she could
> not hear the train, but the radio woke her more than the train…
>
> Would you be so kind as to give us a technique that will help her
> overcome her fear of the train; and are there any techniques to aid
> these sleepless nights?
>
> Thanks in advance for any advice you can give us in this situation.
>
> P.S. We love your show, and have just purchased your book.
>
> Sleepless in Denver,
>
> Joe

----- Original Message -----

From: diannagregory

To: Supernanny@yahoogroups.com

Sent: Wednesday, February 16, 2005 11:35 AM

Subject: [Supernanny] Re: 2 year old son

My daughter is two (Jan 3) and basically what I do is this:

Dinner: I serve dinner, if she doesn't eat dinner, she doesn't get
anything else. When she says she's hungry later, I re-offer dinner. 
If I want to get her to eat her veggies, lots of times I'll finish
cooking those first, and serve them without anything else on the
plate.

Misbehaving:
I do the "counting".  If I ask her to put her coat on, and she
refuses, I ask her again.  Then I tell her that I am going to count
to 3 and if she doesn't comply, I'm going to force the coat on her.
Many times, she'll then come and agree to the coat on.  If she
doesn't, I count one... two... and at three, I grab her and force
the coat on.

If she's touching stuff she's not supposed to... now she knows
better to listen, but when she was younger, I'd grab her arm and
say "no. that's not yours. don't touch it."  then I'd let her arm
go. I'd give her 3 chances before moving her whole self someplace
else.  That would usually result in a crying fit.  But now, when I
tell her no, she stops touching whatever it is she's not supposed to.

Another technique is redirecting.  Say she is tossing peas onto the
floor.  I tell her if she doesn't want her peas, then to put them on
my plate.  If she's tearing up kleenex, I tell her she needs to
throw the kleenex away, and we go to the trash can and she throws it
away.  If she's blowing bubbles with milk (aka, spitting it out), I
tell her not to and if she does it again, I take the glass of milk
away.

I don't know if they work for everyone but they work fo rme so far.
I love the Supernanny show.  My kid is still a bit young for many of
her techniques.  Maybe around 3, she'll be old enough for time-outs,
but I don't think they're quite effective yet.

I feel that if you're a good parent, you shouldn't HAVE to spank.
The kids know how to behave, and behave well because of good
parenting.  The people that spank tend to have already lost control.

What if you took her to a train museum, to go see model trains, or
the train tracks to see the real train.  Once she sees what the
train is, maybe she won't be so afraid of it anymore.

My daughter is two (Jan 3) and basically what I do is this:

Dinner: I serve dinner, if she doesn't eat dinner, she doesn't get
anything else. When she says she's hungry later, I re-offer dinner.
If I want to get her to eat her veggies, lots of times I'll finish
cooking those first, and serve them without anything else on the
plate.

Misbehaving:
I do the "counting".  If I ask her to put her coat on, and she
refuses, I ask her again.  Then I tell her that I am going to count
to 3 and if she doesn't comply, I'm going to force the coat on her.
Many times, she'll then come and agree to the coat on.  If she
doesn't, I count one... two... and at three, I grab her and force
the coat on.

If she's touching stuff she's not supposed to... now she knows
better to listen, but when she was younger, I'd grab her arm and
say "no. that's not yours. don't touch it."  then I'd let her arm
go. I'd give her 3 chances before moving her whole self someplace
else.  That would usually result in a crying fit.  But now, when I
tell her no, she stops touching whatever it is she's not supposed to.

Another technique is redirecting.  Say she is tossing peas onto the
floor.  I tell her if she doesn't want her peas, then to put them on
my plate.  If she's tearing up kleenex, I tell her she needs to
throw the kleenex away, and we go to the trash can and she throws it
away.  If she's blowing bubbles with milk (aka, spitting it out), I
tell her not to and if she does it again, I take the glass of milk
away.

I don't know if they work for everyone but they work fo rme so far.
I love the Supernanny show.  My kid is still a bit young for many of
her techniques.  Maybe around 3, she'll be old enough for time-outs,
but I don't think they're quite effective yet.

I love this show!  I have a 15 year old daughter, a 9 year old
daughter and a 5 year old stepson.  I have spanked my kids in the
past, not much though.  I have found though that spanking my youngest
daughter gets me nowhere.  I don't want to inflict pain to her and it
doesn't do any good anyhow.  I have just felt SO horrible when I
spanked her.
I have tried the Supernanny techniques and they seem to work better.
I have put her on a schedule in the
morning and it works GREAT!   We used to be yelling at each other in
the morning because we were both running behind and couldn't find
things at the last minute.  This made me feel bad because I'm the
adult and I should be setting a better example for her.
My husband on the other hand, whenever he happens to see this show on,
yells at the tv....JUST SPANK THEM!  Like that's just the whole answer
to all the problems we've seen on this show.
Then last Saturday my in-laws were over for a birthday part and this
show came up in conversation.  I asked my sister-in-law if she'd seen
this show.  She's about 22 or 23 and has a son who will be 2 in May.
She  said what's to learn, you just give them a spanking.......  She
thought it was so simple.  It was on the tip of my tongue to say,
Yeah, and what happens when that technique doesn't work anymore?
You'd better have a Plan B or even Plan C.
I've even told people when this subject comes up that not ALL people
want to spank their kids and that some people just can't handle
spanking.  Meaning that they can't control themselves and it turns
into abuse intead of a technique to correct a behavior.
I don't know........what do you all think???  I think that if you can
correct a behavior without spanking, that would be the better
alternative.   Every woman having a baby should also be given
Supernanny's book!

Have you tried Supernanny's "naughty spot" technique? If it works for
him (2 mins., as he is only 2 yrs. old), then maybe you will have
less occasion to be cross with him.

Other than that, realize that "the terrible 2's" are a known phase -
it will pass. And keep in mind that so much of who he will become is
determined from birth to age 3. You do not want to shame him in any
way at this time.

Also, take time for YOU. Once he is in bed, be sure to have a de-
stress regimen, hot bath, candles, meditation or relaxation tapes,
and a massage from hubby never hurt either.

Take care of you,
Daisyschicken

--- In Supernanny@yahoogroups.com, "Melanie Rodrigue"
<mellyrodrigue@H...> wrote:
>

Supernanny !

My wife and I have a 2 year old daughter, who up until a couple of
weeks ago slept with us at night.  We have been trying to train her
to sleep in her own room, in her own bed at night.

At first we tried the technique shown on the program with the twin
girls, and placed her in bed, gave her a hug and kiss, an then
left.  When she can our of the room, we returned her, and eventually
this worked to get her to sleep.

The problem is that we live about 3 miles from some rail road
tracks , and my daughter is afraid of the train.  Everything a train
goes by in the night; she wakes up and comes to our room, crying
that she is afraid of the train.  I believe her fear is real,
because she is afraid of the train in the day time too.  This
happens about 10 times a night.

We tried the technique, used in the show with the little boy who was
climbing out of his crib, and sat next to her bed, when we returned
her to sleep.  This seemed to calm her, but this happens as
mentioned about 10 times a night.

We also tried to place a radio in the bed room, so that she could
not hear the train, but the radio woke her more than the train…

Would you be so kind as to give us a technique that will help her
overcome her fear of the train; and are there any techniques to aid
these sleepless nights?

Thanks in advance for any advice you can give us in this situation.

P.S. We love your show, and have just purchased your book.

Sleepless in Denver,

Joe

----- Original Message -----

From: cvevie

To: Supernanny@yahoogroups.com

Sent: Tuesday, February 08, 2005 3:45 PM

Subject: [Supernanny] Help please

I have a 6-year-old boy (Eric) and 4-year-old girl (Mélissa).  It
seems like Eric has always felt left aside since Mélissa came.

However, I have just started using Supernanny's technique with Eric
for his roughness with other, i.e., pushing, hitting and other
things.

My problem is at school.  I have a very tiny boy and he is shy. 
However, he seems to get teased all the time because he is a
follower and not a leader.  In the past 3 weeks, I keep getting
notes from school saying he is pushing around and hitting other
kids.  Most of this is in the school yard.  I am asking him what the
problem is but he can't tell me what it is, he won't open up.  Would
someone have some suggestions on how to deal with this as I am
getting pretty tired of this.  It seems like he is always in
trouble!!!   However, a lot of times, he will come home telling me
that some kids are always bugging him but it this true really....
not sure.  Last week, he came in with a big red mark on his cheek
and however, no one has called me to tell me that something happened
at school.  The next day, I get a little note saying that he was
pushing again.....  What is going on?  Is it really him or what?  I
am so confused now I just don't know anymore. 

Thanks for your advise on this.

vevie

I have a 6-year-old boy (Eric) and 4-year-old girl (Mélissa).  It
seems like Eric has always felt left aside since Mélissa came.

However, I have just started using Supernanny's technique with Eric
for his roughness with other, i.e., pushing, hitting and other
things.

My problem is at school.  I have a very tiny boy and he is shy.
However, he seems to get teased all the time because he is a
follower and not a leader.  In the past 3 weeks, I keep getting
notes from school saying he is pushing around and hitting other
kids.  Most of this is in the school yard.  I am asking him what the
problem is but he can't tell me what it is, he won't open up.  Would
someone have some suggestions on how to deal with this as I am
getting pretty tired of this.  It seems like he is always in
trouble!!!   However, a lot of times, he will come home telling me
that some kids are always bugging him but it this true really....
not sure.  Last week, he came in with a big red mark on his cheek
and however, no one has called me to tell me that something happened
at school.  The next day, I get a little note saying that he was
pushing again.....  What is going on?  Is it really him or what?  I
am so confused now I just don't know anymore.

Thanks for your advise on this.

vevie

Hi Melanie!

My name is Amy and I too have a two year old son,He was two on Dec
29th I also have a one year old son. I had a heck of a time with them
until I started watching supernanny. My two year old would yell, hit,
spit, kick, push his younger brother and he would tear everything
apart if I turned my head for 30 seconds. He and I would fight all
day long and my husband worked nights which was the hardest time for
me. On the weekends when my husband is home him and I would fight
because of all of this.

I have started using some of supernannys tricks and boy what a
difference!! And such a quick change! Its was only about three days
into everything that my husband pointed out how much we weren't
fighting and how well Dominic (my two year old) was behaving. Thats
when I realized it was working!!

I tried the "naughty chair" with him and that didn't work! So I use
one of our spare bedrooms as the "naughty room". If he does anything
he isn't suppose to. I do just as Jo says, I get down to his level
tell him that he isn't to do whatever it is he is doing and that if
he keeps doing it I will put him in the naughty room. The first day
of this was the worst, I felt bad because I was putting him in there
almost every half hour. I felt horrible. but I knew it was because I
hadn't been consistant before so I kept at it. Now a week later he
prob only visits the naughty room once or twice all day. After his
two minutes are up I open the door and get down to his level tell him
again what he did and ask him not to do it again. I also make him
give me or his younger brother a hug (to say he is sorry). Who ever
he wronged is who I make him hug. Which he does with out a problem.
If he makes a mess and does not help clean it up I give him a warning
and then if he still doesn't I put him in the room same as before.
However when he is done and gives his hug i make him help me clean it
up and praise him after he does. I have started waking him up at the
sametime every morning and feed him and bath him on a schedule. We
are still working on bedtime with him however we do finally have him
sleeping in his own room. He use to sleep in the living room! So we
are making progress. Trust me if you listen to what she says and keep
it up and make sure not to lose control yourself (yelling or
spanking) it will work. The first day is the worst but trust me it
will get better. i am truly amazed at all the progress both myself,
my husband and I have made. I also noticed that the less my two year
old does wrong the better my one year old acts who is of course
acting out as an example! :). I use to yell and and spank his ( the
two year old) hands and I haven't yelled or spanked his hands in over
a week! What a difference! I am not sure what all Jo has scheduled in
her schedules, however I only make waking up breakfast, lunch, snack
time, dinner and bath time scheduled. I do every night play with them
after dinner for about an hour and I also make sure to read to them
but I don't do this at any certain time.

To keep him interested in his toys I put all the toys up in a
rubbermaid container and only take about five toys out he has them
for about three days and then I will rotate them in and out. This not
only helps keep the mess down but also keeps them interested in their
toys and make their playtime more fun!

I try to include my two year old in chores as well. This I never did
before i would just keep yelling at him to go play!! but I have found
that if I include him not only do I get things done faster but he
learns responsibility as well. After dinner he helps me by scraping
his own plate (he now does this will out me asking him) He takes care
of his one year old brothers plate. He helps put the food away after
a trip to the store. try to include him in what you are doing in
anyway possible. You would be surprised how much it matters to them
to help no matter how small the job! Just make sure to make a big
deal out of it if they do it right with lots of praise!!

Hope this helps

Amy

--- In Supernanny@yahoogroups.com, "mln_rae" <mellyrodrigue@H...>
wrote:
>
> Hey My name is Melanie and I have a 2 year old son who i fight
with
> every day!!!!! Help!!!!! It is starting to come between my husband
> and i
Hi Melanie, It is Misty the one with 4 children.  I bought the book
TheSuperNanny by Jo Frost.  Have you tried to use the "NaughtyStep"
tool like the SuperNanny does in her show.  The book talks about how
to use it. You can also get ideas from the SuperNanny. I am also
trying to set up a routine like The SuperNanny does in her shows. Do
you watch he show.  where I live It is on Monday night at 10pm Ilive
in Fontana, Calif. I am at Pacific standard time.   If you would
like to chat more you can email me directly at
littlecurlylocks@... If any one has any ideas on how to
make a routine plese let me know. Misty

Hey My name is Melanie and I have a 2 year old son who i fight with
every day!!!!! Help!!!!! It is starting to come between my husband
and i

Hello,

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