E-Mail part 2: The Revenge of the E-mail (2/4) – Jenny L- rating G

For disclaimers etc see part 0:




FROM: Daniel Jackson djackson@...
TO: Teal'c mr_t@...
SENT: 0731 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: !!!!!

Isn't it wonderful??? Sam and Jack are having a baby…….


FROM: Teal'c mr_t@...
TO: Daniel Jackson djackson@...
SENT: 0736 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: <no subject>

Daniel Jackson,

I believe the saying is `don't numerate your edible poultry before
it has gestated'. We cannot be certain that Major Carter is with
child.

Teal'c


FROM: Daniel Jackson djackson@...
TO: Teal'c mr_t@...
SENT: 0743 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Sam and Jack

It has to be, Teal'c. Who else could it be? Do you think we will get
asked to be godparents?


FROM: Teal'c mr_t@...
TO: Daniel Jackson djackson@...
SENT: 0748 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: False Gods

Daniel Jackson

Why would I wish to be the father of a God?

Teal'c


FROM: Daniel Jackson djackson@...
TO: Cassandra Fraiser aliens_rock@...
SENT: 0749 MT 10 02 2005
SUBJECT: The next stage

Cassie, have you heard? Sam's pregnant.


FROM: Daniel Jackson djackson@...
TO: Jack O'Neill jackfishes@...
SENT: 0751 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Family

Congratulations, Jack!!!! You must be so happy.


FROM: General George Hammond genghammond@...
TO: Jack O'Neill jackfishes@...
SENT: 0834 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Major Carter

Congratulations, son, you and Sam deserve this. If there is anything
I can do to help please just ask. I mentioned it to my daughter and
she is going to dig up some of the girl's old things.
A word of advice though, Jacob and I are going out to play golf
today but you and Sam need to tell him soon: it will be better than
him hearing the news from somebody else.

General George Hammond


FROM: Jack O'Neill jackfishes@...
TO: Major Louis Ferretti majlferetti@...
SENT: 1000 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Weird

Hey, Ferretti,

Is there something going on I don't know about? I've been getting a
lot of weird e-mails from the base. I swear that if this is another
one of your stunts, you and Janet are never going to produce any
little Ferrettis. Got that?

Jack

P.S. You better do something for Janet for Valentines Day or you
could be at the wrong end of a *very* large needle.


FROM: Major Louis Ferretti majlferetti@...
TO: Jack O'Neill jackfishes@...
SENT: 1002 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Re: Weird

You really don't know do you Jack? This e-mail was sent around base:

>FROM: Doctor Janet Fraiser majjfraiser@...
>TO: SGC personnel allpersonnel@...
>SENT: 2344 MT 12 02 2005
>SUBJECT: Test Results
>
>To all personnel;
>
>The latest set of blood test results has just returned from the
lab. One blood sample tested positive for pregnancy unfortunately
the test sample was not labelled correctly and we cannot identify
the woman to whom it belonged.
>To save me from re testing every woman on base I would be grateful
if anyone who thinks they might be pregnant could come and see me in
confidence tomorrow.
>
>Dr J. Fraiser
>

We all just guessed it was you and Sam. There isn't really anyone
else it could be. Becky and Jonas aren't even talking to each other
at the moment and Janet is not gonna send an e-mail like that about
herself. The guys and I sat down and went through all the female
personnel who went to the infirmary that day and you were the only
possibility.
Jack, are you ready to be a dad again. Just think how much brainier
than you your kids are gonna be!

Louis

P.S. You can be first on the boy/girl pool!!!! I've already taken
five hundred bucks.


FROM: Jack O'Neill jackfishes@...
TO: Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter lieucolscarter@...
SENT: 1004 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Time

I have to have some time to think, Sam; I'm just not good at
handling this stuff. I'm going out for a bit, I'll talk to you when
I get back.

Love you,

Jack


FROM: Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter lieucolscarter@...
TO: Doctor Janet Fraiser majjfraiser@...
SENT 1032 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Virus

Janet,

Sorry, I missed meeting you for coffee, my computer has had a virus
causing it to shut down. I've lost everything since my last e-mail
from Jack yesterday. This is the first time I've been able to get on-
line and everything is gone.
You know I think I might have a virus too….


FROM: Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter lieucolscarter@...
TO: Doctor Janet Fraiser majjfraiser@...
SENT 1039 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Virus

Sorry about that. Simmonds just managed to cause a surge in the
power supply while doing something on his computer. (And if I find
anymore naked Lara Croft pictures on the science labs network
someone is going to be in trouble.) You would really think that a
top-secret government base would have a more secure computer system.
I think I might have some weird virus because everyone keeps acting
really strangely, grinning at me or looking at my stomach and
someone has taken the coffee out of the coffee machine and replaced
it with de-caff. Tell me if you think I am going nuts!!

Sam

P.S. How are things with you and Ferretti?


FROM: Lieutenant Graham Simmonds lieugsimmonds@...
TO: sams_fans sam_fans@yahoogroups.com
SENT: 1111 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: The baby…

I can't believe that our beautiful angel is pregnant. I never
allowed myself to believe that there was a real relationship between
her and O'Neill, what does she see in him?

The big G

`Because I care about him ……. more than my CO'


FROM: Jay Felger jfelger@...
TO: sams_fans sam_fans@yahoogroups.com
SENT: 1114 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: The baby spoiler space

Some of us do not want to know about things that are going to happen
in the future therefore *please* remember the spoiler space. Like
this:

*
*
*
*
*
*

See – it's easy. I just glad that the baby isn't Martouf's; I'll
take anyone over him.

Jay

`You, Chloe, a tub of jello.'


FROM: Major Paul Davis majpdavis@...
TO: sams_fans sam_fans@yahoogroups.com
SENT: 1119 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Spoiler spaces

I don't think that really needs a spoiler space. It's just
speculation – we don't know for certain that she is pregnant.
Shouldn't this sort of thing be in the group rules?

Davis

`I find liasing with the pentagon really sexy'


FROM: Sergeant John Taylor sargjtaylor@...
TO: sams_fans sam_fans@yahoogroups.com
SENT: 1123 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Does it really matter!!!!!

Guys, you are all sad! You have all read the message and even the
most socially challenged on base have heard the news so does it
really matter??!?!?

Oh, god, how do I unsubscribe from this madness?

Johnny

`Naked pictures at XXXXXX.com'


FROM: Sergeant Walter Siler sarwsiler@...
TO: sams_fans sam_fans@yahoogroups.com
SENT: 1130 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Re: The baby spoiler space

Jay,

Your post got me thinking. If it has to be one man whom would you
rather be going out with her?

I would chose Daniel because as soon as the Colonel found out he
would kick his ass and the relationship would be over quickly. Or
maybe Orlin because he would ascend pretty quickly and she would be
single, again.

What are your thoughts? Let me know.

Spaceboy Siler

`Oh, what a lovely wrench'


FROM: Simon Coombs scoombs@...
TO: sams_fans sam_fans@yahoogroups.com
SENT: 1141 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Fic

Graham, you promised me fic! Where is it?????

Coombs

P.S. How do you guys get your quotes to appear on the bottom of your
e-mails?


FROM: General George Hammond genghammond@...
TO: Tessa Hammond grandpasgurl@...
SENT: 1644 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Say thank you

Dear Tessa,

Did you have a nice time today, princess? I'm so proud of the A you
got for your school project. Don't forget to say thank you to
Bra'tac for the candy he gave you.

Grandpa George


FROM: Tessa Hammond grandpasgurl@...
TO: Bra'tac funkydude@...
SENT: 1656 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Thank you!

Thank you, Mr Bra'tac, for the candy you gave me when you were at my
house before you and Grandpa went out to play golf. I've made you a
picture like the one I made Grandpa to put on his desk `cos you are
almost as cool as Uncle Jack.

Tessa

P.S. Kayla says thank you too.


FROM: Bra'tac funkydude@...
TO: Tessa Hammond grandpasgurl@...
SENT: 1701 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: <no subject>

Tessa of Texas

You are an intelligent child and will grow to be a formidable young
woman. I would be honoured to have your picture on the walls of my
Tel'tac.

Master Bra'tac


FROM: Cassandra Fraiser aliens_rock@...
TO: Daniel Jackson djackson@...
SENT: 1704 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: OH MY GOD!

I can't believe it's taken me this long to get to your e-mail….
Daniel, we are the BEST matchmakers, now we just have to help my mom
and Louis. But how do you know? Are you sure? I can't believe Sam
didn't tell us first.

Cassie


FROM: Daniel Jackson djackson@...
TO: Cassandra Fraiser aliens_rock@...
SENT: 1705 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Are you sure???

Yes, we are sure. Sam didn't really tell us, it came out by accident
but there isn't really anyone else it could be. And it gets better.
Cassie you have to promise not to tell anyone, but Jack is going to
propose tonight, he has got it all planned out… It was obvious to me
that those two belonged together from the first time I saw them
together on Abydos.

Daniel


FROM: Cassandra Fraiser aliens_rock@...
TO: Daniel Jackson djackson@...
SENT: 1706 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: how???

How is Jack gonna propose? I need details and I need them NOW!


FROM: Cassandra Fraiser aliens_rock@...
TO: Daniel Jackson djackson@...
SENT: 1707 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: …….

I SAID NOW!


FROM: Daniel Jackson djackson@...
TO: Cassandra Fraiser aliens_rock@...
SENT: 1708 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Details

Jack bought the ring weeks ago – General Hammond is looking after it
for him. He originally planned to propose tomorrow, Valentines Day
(and I have been doing some very interesting research into the
origins of St Valentine – do you realise the whole legend could be
about a Goa'uld?), but because of everything he has moved it
forward. Jack booked the smartest restaurant in town, and then they
are going dancing. After that, he is going to take her out to his
deck and propose to her under the stars and he has bought champagne.
I hope it goes right for him – he only told me the details because
he was worried that Sam wouldn't like it and would turn him down.

Daniel


FROM: Cassandra Fraiser aliens_rock@...
TO: Daniel Jackson djackson@...
SENT: 1711 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Awwwwww!!!

Sam is sooooo lucky. I wish a guy would do that for me. Sam won't
turn him down – have you seen the way she looks at him when she
thinks no one else is watching?

Cassie


FROM: Thor supreme_commander_22@...
TO: Jack O'Neill jackfishes@...
SENT: 1723 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Dolls

I must apologise, O'Neill, for communicating with you in this way,
but our scientists have been exploring inferior technology and I
found the idea of e-mail most intriguing. We have, however; had to
ban Loki from using the system after he attempted to purchase a
replica of the star ship Enterprise from e-bay. In all my years of
intergalactic travel, I have never seen a more impractical design
for a ship.
Is it possible that you could acquire another `doll' for me? Freya
requested a loan of mine and when she returned it, it had several
punctures.

Thor. Supreme Commander of the Asguard fleet.


FROM: Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter lieucolscarter@...
TO: Doctor Janet Fraiser majjfraiser@...
SENT: 1752 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Today

Janet,

This is getting weird. Every room I have been into today someone has
asked me if I want to sit down or how I am feeling and they have all
had these stupid grins. I can't get hold of Jack who seems to have
disappeared and people keep congratulating me. Are you sure I am not
in some kind of alternate universe?

Sam


FROM: Doctor Janet Fraiser majjfraiser@...
TO: Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter lieucolscarter@...
SENT: 1754 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Re: Today

Don't worry about it, Sam, it will probably all be cleared up in a
few days. So what have you got planned for tonight? It's not that
long until Valentines Day.

Janet

P.S. I was going through my records and I noticed that you missed
your routine blood tests last week. Come by the infirmary tomorrow
morning and I'll do them. Hanging around Jack has obviously been a
bad influence on you.


FROM: Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter lieucolscarter@...
TO: Doctor Janet Fraiser majjfraiser@...
SENT: 1759 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Blood Tests.

What will be cleared up, Janet? You sound like you know something. I
think that Jack might be planning something tonight – that is where
he has been all day. I'm so excited, Jack rarely surprises me but
when he does it is always something good! When Jack told me he was
retiring I never imagined that I could be this happy.

Sam


FROM: Doctor Janet Fraiser majjfraiser@...
TO: Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter lieucolscarter@...
SENT: 1801 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: You two…

……….. make me sick sometimes. I'm so jealous, why can't Louis be a
bit more like that? I don't need diamonds or roses everyday but
surely a box of chocolates for Valentines Day isn't too much to ask?

Janet


FROM: Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter lieucolscarter@...
TO: Doctor Janet Fraiser majjfraiser@...
SENT: 1803 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Romance

He is a man, Janet. Sometimes you have to give them a little hint.
Or a staff weapon to the back of the head.

Sam


FROM: Doctor Janet Fraiser majjfraiser@...
TO: Major Louis Ferretti majlferetti@...
SENT: 1809 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Tomorrow night

Hey, Louis,

What are you doing tomorrow night? I thought you might like to go
out somewhere.

Janet


FROM: Major Louis Ferretti majlferetti@...
TO: Doctor Janet Fraiser majjfraiser@...
SENT: 1811 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Re: Tomorrow night

Sorry, babe, no can do, I'm going out with the guys. But you could
come over to my place tonight if you like. ;-)

Ferretti


FROM: Doctor Janet Fraiser majjfraiser@...
TO: Major Louis Ferretti majlferetti@...
SENT: 1814 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Us

Louis,

I'm sorry, but this isn't working out. I don't think we should see
each other anymore outside of work.

Janet


FROM: Major Louis Ferretti majlferetti@...
TO: Doctor Janet Fraiser majjfraiser@...
SENT: 1817 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: < no subject>

Janet,

Did I do something wrong? If this is about Valentines Day then I'm
sure we could go out if you really want to.

Ferretti


FROM: Doctor Janet Fraiser majjfraiser@...
TO: Major Louis Ferretti majlferetti@...
SENT: 1820 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: The future

I'm sorry, Louis, but I think that we just want different things
from our relationship.

Goodbye,

Janet


FROM: Lieutenant Rebecca Rush lieurrush@...
TO: Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter lieucolscarter@...
SENT: 1824 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Jonas

Sam,

I'm sorry to bring this to you with everything that is going on with
you at the moment but Jonas broke up with me by e-mail. I hate him.
I can't believe he did this to me. And I want him back. I'm so
miserable. Even my mother liked him. Can you talk to him and find
out what I did wrong; he listens to you?

Becky

P.S. Do they do Ben and Jerry's Chocolate fudge brownie in the
commissary?


FROM: Jonas Quinn jquinn@...
TO: Teal'c mr_t@...
SENT: 1824 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Becky

Teal'c

I followed yours and Ferretti's advice and I am so lonely but I
can't do anything about it. Do you think she is missing me? On
Kelowna, when an attachment is broken, it is customary not to have
any contact with the other party. I should really wear a ceremonial
veil when I am out in public to hide my face in case I come across
her.

Jonas

P.S. Have you got any Rocky Road in your quarters?


FROM: Harry Forester sarghforester@...
TO: sams_fans sam_fans@yahoogroups.com
SENT: 1834 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Newbie

Hi,

I'm a newbie here. Siler told me about this group which he thought I
might like. I work the base security cameras so if you ever want to
do a bit of unobserved Sam watching while I am on just come on in
and see me.

Harry

P.S. Walter said that someone was writing fic, has it been posted
yet???


FROM: Jack O'Neill jackfishes@...
TO: Daniel Jackson djackson@...
SENT: 1853 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Help me!

Whatever you are doing now can you make sure that Sam stays on base –
I'm coming over there as soon as I have done one other thing. I
can't wait any longer, Danny. I love her and if she is pregnant,
then that is just an added bonus, but I want her to be my wife. If
she'll have me.

Jack


FROM: Jack O'Neill jackfishes@...
TO: General Jacob Carter genjcarter@...
SENT: 1854 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Your permission

Jacob,

I think you know that I love your daughter. Can I have your
permission to ask her to marry me?

Jack


FROM: Cassandra Fraiser aliens_rock@...
TO: Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter lieucolscarter@...
SENT: 1855 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Hey Sam

I don't know if I'm supposed to tell you this yet but I just
couldn't wait to say CONGRATULATIONS!! This is so great….

Cassie


FROM: Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter lieucolscarter@...
TO: Cassandra Fraiser aliens_rock@...
SENT: 1856 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Congratulations

It's nice to hear from you Cassie, but what are you congratulating
me on?

Sam


FROM: Cassandra Fraiser aliens_rock@...
TO: Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter lieucolscarter@...
SENT: 1857 MT 13 02 2005
SUBJECT: Re: Congratulations

It's a bit late to try and hide it now, Sam. Everyone knows that you
are pregnant!

Cassie (Honorary big sister?)



I'd love feedback if you feel so inclined…......... Jenny L
bray_4_amber@...